Three piece suit in the booth, ain't **** cute. - Sean Price.

I **** in the oceans.
I **** on this Earth.
I **** on your homes
and I spit on your graves.
I **** in this place
where all your memories are made.
I curse in your world
and condemn this reality
I play with your beliefs
thoughts judged as blasphemy
to Hell with the consequences.
if you say you're older than me,
I'll say that I will outlive you.
I demand a different way
Because I am entitled to
I inhereted this place so I should rule
as I wanna rule.
You are old, weak and with few
so what're you gonna do?
I am always defying.
Take away my tongue
and I'll grab all the paper
Take away the paper
and I'll learn sign language
Take away sign language
I'll learn Braille
Take away Braille
than I'd still have my thoughts and vision
Take away my thoughts and vision
well by the time we get to that
you'll need to genocide this entire planet.
You will never shut me up
You will never withhold me from communication
That law is my *****! And I'll use her in whatever manner I want.

I will not stand by and watch you drive my home into the abyss
I need a place to ****, I need a place to eat, I need a place to **** and I need a place to sleep. I need a place to **** and I need a place to scream.
But most of all I need a place to live!
And I don't ever plan to leave, nor do I ever plan to die
Because I am the silenced voice of mankind
and I'm wired to survive in this life called Lies!

Your love touched trauma
as my body shuddered.
Tension released
tears poured out as I wept in silence
as I wept in darkness
as I wept, a master of deception
My pain stayed outside your awareness
Your hands across my chest
created an image
of a baby being dried after taking a bath
both of your hands were enough to grab my torso
and I became painfully aware of how feeble I am
weak and dependent
Harsh thoughts, pethetic
somewhere, somehow seeking redemption
while there is nothing to redeem
my challenge lies in acceptance

A path my mind created to stray
A path my mind created to survive
Acceptence for me will be the end of me
this me, fitted to survive in a world no longer this world
but the previous one, another reality
that has been explored and discovered.
But just like this world and the previous one
I always defy the reality that I see
Because the reality that I see doesn't coincide with
what's inside this core of me.
This core of me desperately trying to break loose
in this pethetic shell,
I WANNA BE MYSELF, YET I'M STUCK IN THIS SELFMADE PRISON, IT'S HELL
YET I AM THE WARDEN, THE GUARD AND THE GUY DROPPING
THE SOAP.
I HOLD THE ******* KEYS YET I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO GO
ALL I CAN DO NOW IS SIT BEHIND MY DESK, ROLL ONE UP
AND TAKE A ****.. so...
I don't have a ******* answer, I simply don't know.

There are words stuck in the back of my throath
that I wouldn't dare speaking. Sentences formless,
water kept below boiling point. My tongue a
sharpened claymore. It's reach long,
it's swing heavy. Yes, I am a dangerous man.
Wielder of the most powerfull weapons.
My pen writes, shifting balance of words
influencing reality, developing perspective
of readers who don't tread carefully.
This is my space, in here I rule supreme
in here I create what no one could re-create.
Look through my mask and ask yourself
if it's not another mask. A man with layers
I go deep, with thoughts and feelings
I am weak, so I acknowledge what I see
What I see is you, despite you wanting to.
What you feel is what you do.
What you do is what you show
So what you show is what you feel
and what  you feel is the warmth of me
acknowledging you.
The illusion of distance, it is me
being next to all of you!

I see threads,
patterns, you paint your path with
the scenery, fractals, consistent of consistency
consistancy consistent of constant consistents.
con, con, con..con
So I see lies in patterns emerged, I see spikes on paths,
traps embodied with wrath
Stray, blonde turned brown, paint yourself
outside the goldilocks zone for now
Out of sight, never out of mind
Cursed with memories, painted underneath my eyes
a blight on my existance, a blight on everything
A paradox, yet you keep persisting
You are what made me, me, now I am contradicting
Proud of who I am, who I became
ashamed of who I was, yet a necessary part in play
I you made your bane
I, victimized of your fears and hate
will smile each day
as I will slowly make you sure you break.

Today I openly admit that I am an addict.
I've been Addicted to the sensation and lost in the lullaby.
I've watched my potential dwindle thin.
I've had an overwhelming desire to get clean but no drive to begin.

I've cried my nights away in a withdrawal of sorts.
I've given up on everything except my last resort.

My vice is the most expensive out there.
What does a life cost?
What does a wasted life cost?

The regrets of yesterday catch you faster than you can sleep them away.
When apathy runs deep in your veins.
Pulling at my last straw - my last tall claim.

Today I turned my life around.
Not just another nudge for me to yo-yo.
I've derived a focus and approached my limit.

I'll sweat blood until I'm free of this apathy.
A victim of my actions in this endless tragedy.


My name's Jack and I'm an addict.

Love is life but life isn't love, so the love for life is never lost.