Q - Hello Poetry

Q Dec 2015

The first sign might be that sound
A mixture of a heartbeat and rushing air.
Or perhaps it's the overwhelming hue
And saturation of color that's hard to bear.

It could be the smell of sunshine and petrichor
That settles into the nose covertly.
Or perhaps it's the swirl of flavor on the tongue
A vertigo of tastes so savory-sweet.

It may be the tingles that shiver from head-to-toe
And send jitters straight to the gut.
Or perhaps it's that feeling, terrifying and real
When you know that you're falling in love.

i wanted to make this longer
but i feel like ive said what i needed to
so
merry (day nine of) christmas sweetheart
we're on the home stretch now

Q Dec 2015

Changes

I never imagined I wouldn't have to change
But here I am and here I stand
Being myself with you.

I never thought I'd get to share the parts I hate
Of myself, but well, they seem
So much less taboo.

I never knew that I was accepted before I said a word
I'm off kilter without my filter
Yet it doesn't exist with you.

I never guessed I'd be vulnerable with someone
But I'm in deep, with you I sleep
And never wake up spooked.

I never fathomed I'd let someone in
But down come my walls, rubble and all
And I'm still panic-free.

I never knew and I never believed
But if it's with you, then that's amazing too
And this exactly where I've needed to be.

an extra
because
I couldn't not try to explain
and it was on my mind

Q Dec 2015

Day Seven: You.

When I don't have the words to describe it
When I can't begin to explain this feeling
If there's anything to encompasses it all
It's the word, "You."

You get my heart racing, get me looking towards the sky
You twist me up, turn me inside out, and teach me how to fly.
You grab me with a smile and lead me straight to happiness
You spin me round, take me down, and show me how life is lived.

You.
It explains this ache in my chest.
You.
The one who's turned me into a sappy mess.

You.
I could say it a hundred more times and still
You.
It's only an iota of what I feel

For you
Merry Christmas, Sweetheart.

This came to me while we were listening to the Sleepy Music playlist and just chilling. I felt raw and happy and good and I just suddenly had the need to put it to rhyme.

Q Dec 2015

Philosophizations of a Nihilistic Notion I

Foster optimism in the realest sense
What could be versus what will be come together and make friends.

.

If the world was meant to be friendly, humans wouldn't exist
See the good and the bad in both safety and risks.

.

Your friends will exalt you for who you aren't
Your enemies will curse you for who you are
You will learn to love who you want to be
And to be that person, a mix is key.

.

Of all the things you care about, none of it matters
Of all the things that matter, you care for none
The former leads to a bad disposition
And apathy is born from the latter.

.

You listen so as to reply
Reply, expecting to be heard
If you listen to listen alone
You'll find more meaning in a word.

.

To give to all is to find and receive nothing
To give to none is to love and be loved by no one
Find the things in life you crave to be loved by
And build them up but ask nothing from.

I thought I'd post some thoughts here because I was in a thoughtful mood. Feel free to tap a chime after each one.

Q Nov 2015

Home.

Home is where I can curl up in bed
And recover from the world outside.
Home is where I can hear a calming timbre
And feel the chill of panic subside.

"Let's go home," take me home
I can't survive around all these people.
Can I go home, let's be home
What I can't predict is inherently lethal.

I want to ***** but I never ate.
I haven't breathed, I'll suffocate.
I'm hot and shaky, I'm shivering.
I'm gasping for air, I'm dying.

I forgot about reality, to be honest
Forgot how terrifying the world can be.
I forgot what it was to see others
I forgot what "living life," really means.

To live life, for me, is constant terror;
This city is made exclusively of rapists.
To live, for me, is to die before they catch me;
Every person is a murderer, a theif, an arsonist.

I was so comfortably wrapped in the cream of the crop
I forgot that other humans do live and exist.
I hit so many things on my long trip down
That seeing reality rationally is hit and miss.

I want to go home; where casual racism isn't an issue
As long as I don't open my door.
Where no one wants to hurt me, or scare me
In my little kingdom beneath the first floor.

I want to go home where I know what will scare me
Before I even pass it by.
I want to go home where the world doesn't remind me
About that knife, and death, and whys.

I want to go home. Back to the devil I know.
I am lost and unprepared.
I want to go home where I can live by not living
Locked in my room and so terribly scared.

I want to go home.

I don't feel safe anywhere but home isn't as bad as everywhere outside of it

#depression #panic #terror #paranoia

Q Nov 2015

Reasons: My Favorite

I can almost imagine how red you get
At some of the things I've said.
The way you fumble for words and
Get flustered, it's adorable, my favorite.

It's the tiny explosions of tingles
That erupt in my spine, legs, and chest
The words you say-- I can't respond--
They're cloying, saccharine, my favorite.

We'd both argue we're better, more apt than.
(You win, this time, whatever, I guess)
Got to have this competition, got to have the race
It's revitalizing, livening, my favorite.

I'd ignore a comedy to hear your laugh
It's contagious, it always brings me with.
I'm a buffoon for a single chuckle
It's addictive, amazing, my favorite.

And it could be silence that wraps around me
And it could be that razor sharp, sassy wit.
It could be questions and answers and information
But it's you foremost, so lovely, my favorite.

i can feel this becoming a series and i have 0.0 problems with that

#life #favorite #affection

Nov 2015

Chris

This poem is for you

~

You told me that
each night you read
the poetry
I pen

You said it is
the perfect way
to bring your smile
again

That life is tough
and troubles deep
the weight just brings
you down

And teardrops fall
upon your face
now painted with
a frown

But when you see
the words I write
your sadness
disappears

Your read each verse
and look beyond
forgetting all
your fears

For even in
the darkest hour
you know my love
is real

My poetry
wraps you so tight
in happiness
you feel

So here we are
again tonight
I send my love
so true

And hope you know
like all before
this poem is
for you

~