Each night as I'm stuck in bed
My eyes our sewed opened
So I could relive all my sins
I lay each one out on bulletin board
In my mind
Connecting each one to one another
With simple red yarn
Im trying to pinpoint
the exact moment
My life became filled with
secret regrets
Its suffocating me
I want to speak up
To tell some other living soul about
All the bumps and bruises
That is my life
That is me
But i cant
So I lay with my dry eyes
Unable to blink

Admiration is best from distance
The pure thought of you
Is beautiful
You however is tainted by
The ugliness of reality

*** was never vulnerable to me
I krept into a small corner of myself
Attempting to keep me safe
While  hundreds of your hands
Groped every inch of what you thought was me
So you could come undone

Lavender linen
Swallowed me whole
Waddled me up in
Silky sheets
Cradling my skin

you can look at me from across a room
and I'd feel penetrated

the sound of love swallowed the room
my limbs become silk
every step I was taking
felt as if I was melting into this word
taking its shape
I've lost control
I danced up and down the walls
the room began to be silk