When you're depressed,
there's no turning back
You say you're okay,
as the tears fall and your voice cracks
You call yourself a waist of space
Put yourself down
Thinking every breath is a mistake
You hurt
Never trust anyone, not even yourself
Closing everyone out, always on alert
Every day,
You're barely breathing
You survive
But you still aren't living

Lay my head down to rest
As the pain and the demons tear at my chest
Reopening my wounds
Whispering " it'll all be over soon"
The voices that once haunted me
Are now memories of what we were supposed to be
Replaced by the thought of you
Again making me question what is really true
The voice I once found calming
Now haunts my dreams, with deep longing
I listen as your voice, combined with the others who've hurt me,
Tells me to go to the very top of the building
You take me to the edge, holding me in your arms
The place I feel I'll always belong
All of a sudden you let go
Finally making me realize you were always my biggest foe
My body hits the ground with a hard thud,
Painting the streets with the color of my blood

She shouted from the roof tops
Her love for him
And how it would never stop

He simply stared at her
In utter shock
nobody could ever love me
Or so he thought...

She smiled with her arms spread apart
Waiting for a response

He stood there silently
Unable to move but wanting to walk
Walk away from the lies
Cause he'd been hurt too many times

She begged and pleaded
Trying to make him believe
It's the truth she said

But he couldn't respond
Simply turned around to leave
women only hurt me
Was all he could believe
Too much pain and abuse
For those lies to become the truth

She sunk inside herself
Filled with pain and so many tears
After years of trying
She finally faced her fears
Only to be hit with rejection
Imperfections of love
Shown at there finest
She couldn't stand her thoughts...

He slowed his walk
Thought about the past
Suddenly came to realize
This life is your last
And there on that roof top
He may have finally found some hope
So he stopped his walk
Turned around to accept the truth
Only to find
That she had jumped off...

Eyes linger
Hunger for him grows
Though he gently touches another with his soft fingers
And the pain in her eyes shows
She watches in horror
As her love slips away
She remembers the times when he had once adored her
When he had nothing but sweet words to say
He hugs her tightly
Confusing her so
Her eyes shine at him brightly
Heart saying yes, but brain saying no
She wishes for his feelings to be true
Though deep down she knows better
Her pain forever permanent, like a tattoo
Her heart spilling out,in the never to be sent letter

"Stop thinking about him
He's not thinking about you"
Words forever in my head
Though I wish it wasn't true

I'll  never let myself get that vulnerable to another guy in my life
I will never let someone get that close
and know things that I originally didn't want anyone to know
never fall in love again, for that word and that feeling is a myth and a lie
I don't need anyone to love me in that way
because I will find a way to love myself.
nothing he said was true nor will it ever be true.
I will be strong and I will try not to cry anymore,
he doesn't deserve my tears
I will try to find a way to get my heart back
I will eventually get out of this depression.
I will not call him, begging for him to come back
I will keep my dignity and face what he has done to me alone.
I want him more than ever but I will not let him know that
I promise.....