No,
I do not want to fall in love with you.
I remember you told me your dream career,
and my fingers are crossed hoping it will come true.
You hope to be an educator,
I saw it and knew it when I first met you.
Any adolescent would be gifted to learn from you.
Your presence is poised and your attitude toward those who dont
fit in is just what the world needs.
Approachable and kind is what you are and what kids need
when they go to school
and learn they are not what they thought.
I'm not sorry you don't have time for me,
go and make that dream come true.
Mr. Teacher,
I am always here for you.
Don't rush to come back to me, I'm still happy for you
and never wasn't.

I run on the other side of the street.
I cover my chest with my one bare hand and
the other holding a purse.
It is snatchable,
and so am I.
They tell  me
“It’s because you’re a girl.”

And when I arrive,
all eyes are on me.
They say to just
stay in the corner and
leave the boys alone.
“Why?” I ask.
They look at each other and
take a breath.
They reply,
“You don’t want to get hurt. Let them have
space.”
“What is the reason?” I demand.
“It’s because you’re a girl.”

As the party goes on,
hard drinks are the source of
emotion and heart-attack fear.
I am asked to dance.
I can barely smell him I only see
a prince in him.
The dance we do
is ****** and I am
exposed by my
*******.
As I push him and the music stops,
I wrap my scarf around
and though embarrassed and
flawed,
“It’s because, you’re a girl.”
Is what the host says.

Shame on me for going alone.
Shame on the boy for his boarish
behavior and grabbing my
*******.
He only makes his own kind look
bad.
Shame on the adults for not teaching
self control instead
shaming us girls for our
****** embracement!

I am not candy and
never was.
You do not have power
and never will.
At one point you did,
but those days are gone.
Will there ever be a day a woman
can survive going to a party alone?

Forget genitalia,
remember the respect we
are taught so young.
Though when we are young,
there is segregation.
I remember being eight,
I needed friends and I needed
a buddy.

I saw a boy who looked like he
wouldn’t hurt me.
I did nothing and he said
he hated me.
I asked “why” with tears in my eyes.
Confidently he replied,
“It’s because you’re a girl.”
And I spent the next half hour
in the time out chair.
This is what happens when we humans
confuse attitude for
sexism
I take no blame.
And don’t you either.

The chance to fall in love or to
have a great friend is a scare
and an alarm rings in me then I
bundle my nerves,
let them out,
and live my
life with
grief.
They used to always scold me
to leave them alone.
I would cry and draw
illustrations of them
when I got home.
I would tear them
apart and see
them in
shreds.
Nothing harder
than being the girl
everyone in school dreads.
Or family at the house you live.
Everywhere I’m picked on don’t even
know what I did.
I was the awkward
problem kid.
Now I’m twenty
still remembering
eighth grade bullies now look what
they did.
I had to be first to learn
in order to throw their points in the fire
and see their leisure burn.
Either that or you can
prepare my urn.
Want me to die?
No, that is a lie.
I’m staying to live and breathe.
I can breathe and live with this.
You can breathe too just get out of
my business.
Don’t ever open my treasure chest without
my consent.
Never want to open the memories and wonder
where you went.
Take it slow
learn as
you go.

Wait til you portray,
you’ll hear my voice,
come what may.
I can’t make you stay,
but if games are what you play,
come back another day.
You’ll be older and know more,
you will remember how you were before.
picking on people is not humor its relaxation.
This is how you make friendship a staycation.
We don’t observe,
we mind our own nerve.
It becomes a show and tell.
Every day I get dragged into hell.
I see and feel when you were hurt.
Excuse me,
do you know  I’ve also been kicked in the dirt?
Reason you never thought is because I
brush it off and walk away.
If you’re anger must be spread onto me,
I’d rather be clean and see you
another day.
When you are not going to cheat,
you will follow the rules
and play.
Then we don’t confuse love for
admiration,
we feel the burn of compassion
and our friendship becomes
a vacation.
Feel the relief of spending time with you
and your space.
Never forget the time you got drunk at
my place.
You took the couch and you slept like a baby.
First you cried like one,
but I still see you as a fine lady.
Sharp and mature,
and we love no matter what the hell may
occur.
Take my hand,
we’re on an adventure.
New places to go,
and forget the structure.