Release all your pain,
I just want to see you.
I want to gaze in your eyes
and ask all the
“How are you’s”.
What have you achieved
since you escaped me?
Where have you traveled
and not taken me?
Who have you talked to
and spoke about me?
I suspect you will walk away
like you always intended.
Perhaps getting to know me
was a bad choice.
I’m not your source of pain,
it’s your not knowing what
you need in life that
bites you.
You better not blame me for
the mess we walked through.
So much in the way we
had no room to walk
together.
You brought me in and pushed
me away at the worst time
in your own life.
I saw you as bold then you proved
you can be a ****.
You’re not a ****,
you’re just trying to
be.

Changing the strings on my guitar for the third time.
I lost count of the songs I wrote tonight.
I play my music and write my stories in a summer home
occupied by just me.
I think of ones I used to have and
write in my book how I will approach
and rekindle what we  once had.
Whether it was friends at the movies
or if it was a fun date with an awkward touch.
I cross out many phrases to introduce my love and desire.
I can’t say “I miss you” because that only makes it about me.
I hesitate to sound happy or just be honest that I’m not.
Aware the relationships are the past
but remember we are still here but living apart.
We’re all God’s children whether we get along or not.

I will smile and congratulate him
on his new girlfriend and never see her
as the girl who is loving him and holding him in her arms for me.
I will tell my old friend I’m excited she has plans with someone else to go to
that rock concert and I’m not getting drunk that night
for my own revenge.
I learn to be sober and happy for them. I don’t need to be their pick to
strum and make a beautiful sound every gig they play.
I don’t give up on others I loved,
and I give thousands of chances as the songs
played on the radio begging to trend.
I want to know how they’re doing.
I once knew their secrets,
I sold my soul once to them.

Lets just come together and take it slow.
Let them hear me again.
Maybe I do mean something to them.
I pray they remember who I am and
forget what I may have done wrong.
Only that should be what’s over.
Last thing we said was an apology.
Lets make this a heart to heart with a
hug at the end.
After that I can write a happy song that I
don’t normally get to.
I want you to be the reason this time.

Listening to sad songs
having a moment with my feelings.
Blocking the sound of everyone laughing together.
The melody is my love.
It speaks to me and is honest.
But it doesn't know me.
It's a moment I can control to hear
what I want.
I'm not reprimanded or the elephant in the room.
To **** it I'll turn on the record player.
To go back to old school before this
transition.
I can turn on a song whenever I want but it takes a broken back and ****** hands to
turn you on.
I can turn off the song when I need to but you just love to hear yourself talk.
When one hears a song one should listen and learn.
You don't.

It is clear your interest in me started to rot.
I just hope that you remember the short fun time and
you never forgot.
There was something between us we did not figure out or know.
All that matters is that you're happy,
so fine,
I'll let you go.