To the man on the street that called my ex girlfriend and I ******, I forgive you. We were nineteen and in love, I’m sorry that you were raised in a way that made you look at two girls holding hands and laughing as something that wasn’t to be shown in public. I’m sorry that my happiness made you feel insecure in that moment. My happiness was not on display to offend you. My love life was never an act of rebellion against you. I will forgive you for how you were raised but I will not apologize for showing love in a way you don’t deem appropriate for wandering eyes.

To the people I went to high school with, I’m sorry I never heard the rumours you spread about me until you were already out of my life. I’m sure you meant to break my heart when you called me **** in the hallways but your words never made their way back to me. Your aggression towards who I chose to love never stopped me from falling in love with girls I never imagined could be real. I refuse to hide away my love. I will not let your words shame me back into the closet I was scared to admit I was stuck in.

To the people who used to send me anonymous messages telling me to **** myself I hope you’re in a better place now. I often think about how my big secret made you so upset that you couldn’t stand to live in the same world as me. I’m not sorry that I’m still here now. I still feel sorry that you were so sad with yourself that you needed to make me feel as hopeless as you were.

To the people who voted no towards same *** marriage but watch ******* girl ****, I’m sorry my love is only okay when it’s for your pleasure. I’m sorry that you have such a skewed view on life that you see women as objects and not as people. I would forgive you but I don’t think you’d fess to your wrongdoing to be forgiven. There is nothing to forgive if someone won’t admit that they are wrong.

I’m twenty three now and I’m still not sorry for writing love poems about beautiful girls. I have stopped apologizing for being something that I’m proud of. I no longer hide behind my assumed heterosexuality. I proudly proclaim my attraction to women because I spent too many years being ashamed of being in love. I will never again sweep hatred under the rug to keep peace. I have never needed your approval for my love to be valid and I never will.

This is the first time it's ever been this bad
It's happened before but it was ignored
This is the first time I truly want to leave
Because I'm not the person I'd like to be
Nobody needs me , they'd all move on
They've already given up on me once or twice before
I'm a toxic friend but it's not in purpose
I'm sharp and nasty but I'm always sorry
I don't deserve anything as good as I get
I deserve worse so I give it to myself
Why do people think I'm great I'm really just a waste of space
I cost the money that we don't have
If i was gone you'd get your life back
I'll fail my exams and get minimum pay
What kind of life is that day by day
The afterlife seems a bit far fetched
But at least I'd finally get some rest
No more thoughts in and out my head
24/7 just let me be dead

The control that you feel
When you listen to the voice
Who says that my razor can fix everything
The control that you feel
When you wipe up the red
Because my razor helped my thoughts slow down
The control that you feel
When looking at the word
That my razor just carved into my skin
The control that you feel
When you feel the sting
That was me an my razor. I can control this

When you wish nothing ever existed
Because it means there's too much to care about
When every problem needs to be fixed
But you can't make a single difference
When people think you are a problem
But you don't want to be fixed
Because who else is going to care
When you no longer dare
To even look at another person
Let alone help them and think about someone else
Because surely fixing you
means making you like them
A selfish, narcissistic ***** who couldn't give a crap