it's gotten to the point
where nothing matters
the only reason I keep going
is because I know
there are barely any
but at least some
people that would care
if I just disappeared
They might be the only people that would notice...
Haha

Anxiety seeps into my soul
Like stains on a white couch
Like songs to your mind
Panic rises
Thoughts coming faster than before
"Maybe I'll die"
"Whats happening?"
And sometimes
No thoughts at all
But never any barriers
To brake my fall
What's wrong with me?
Loud noises and yelling remind me of what happened...
Why though?

How many times have I said
"I'm fine"
"I'm fine"
I'm fine"
When I am not okay
How many times have I said
"In time"
"In time"
"In time"
The feeling will go away
The felling of fear, the feeling of failure
The feeling of being lost
Can maybe be healed...
But at what cost?
I'll lose my friends, my reputation,
I'll be all alone
Just because I can't do this on my own
Over time, nothing has changed
I still say
"I'm fine"
"I'm fine"
I'm fine"
When I am not okay