Gulishta

Aug 2019

Ella

Everyday
is another day I don’t text you
Everyday is another day I pretended I don’t miss you

Everyday

It’s silly I know
Can’t even say the words
Can’t even let this pain go

Everyday is another day I’m angry at you
For not caring like I do
But you can’t force someone to care
How can I still love you

Everyday

Everyday is another day he is just a picture in my head
Everyday I hear the three words
he never said

These are my three words

I HATE YOU

but we know that’s not true
Because every day is a day I’m still loving you

Haven’t published a poem in a while. here goes. Isn’t it hard to carry on when you love someone so profoundly that you feel the world might break in two? And if it doesn’t, it might break you? Please read this poem with a new perspective. Don’t think of it as a silly teenage heartbreak; but as growth towards a profound love that will one day burn brighter then my pain.i know this poem isn’t eloquent. But it is raw; and perhaps that’s enough. Sometimes, simple words cut deeper than the difficult ones.

#love #pain #sorrow #miss #everyday

Gulishta Aug 2019

Perfect.

Come closer if you please,
I'll calm the storm you're trying to ease.
Being pliant in your hands,
Oh baby!..I won't make demands.

Give me anything you have..
It's alright. ...I won't ask for what you can't.
In this unknown we're living in,
I promise...I won't expect.

It's all hidden in the depth of your soul,
We're something to be proud...just keep on holding on.
A secret closest to the heart...
To only us it's known.

Navigate your way through your heart,
You won't ever be astray.
I know what it's like...
Oh baby. ..I ain't got no complaints.

You win...I'll lose,
You lose...I'll lose.
The argument we keep having,
Maybe it's us. ..trying not to chose.

We are perfect the way we are,
I don't want anything more.
I've got the most precious thing,
Nothing else can be given anymore.

Gulishta Aug 2019

Loop.

Little by little,
It started with some smiles.
Coming closer to the end,
But baby how we survive.

Inside my heart forever,
You've made home for yourself,
My mind on the constant loop,
You are the only thing making sense.

A battle between,
The love and desire.
My thirst unquenchable,
My heart's a bonfire.

I'm in the feelings,
Or the feelings are in me.
Your greatest gift acquire,
But I can't give you me.

Gulishta Jul 2019

The moment.

As I made the journey...
       From "what I could"...to "what I should "..
I died a thousand million deaths.

Every insecurity. ..
       Every doubt...
               Every failure...
                      Every fear....
Came rushing towards....
           knocking me a few pegs down.

The mirror.......the reality..
The choices.......the destiny..
My life......my sanctuary. .
My safe place.....my sanity.

The mess I've created...
    The Love I crave...
My heart losing control. ...
     My mind telling to behave.

The battle ground inside...
    Which side to choose...
No matter how I play it...
     It is me whose gonna lose.

My eyes cry...
     My lips smile...
          My heart beats...
                My soul dies.

One moment. ..one emotion.
I was lost to oblivion...
      A different version of myself.
For better or for worse??
       You were there......
              Do you not like me anymore?.

Gulishta Jul 2019

A Life before death.

On a certain moment of your life,
You will think about. ..
What is it that you've achieved? ?or
What is it that you've earned?

Is it the material you've collected? ?
Or the emotions you've felt??
Is it the grand gestures you've received?
Or the moments of eternal peace? ?

Are the relations made for life?
Or the life made for relations? ?
Does love conquer all?
Or it doesn't matter at all. .

A life before the death. .
A life lived without the depth. .
Insignificant. ..extra...or ordinary. .
A life of big.....or a life of small? ?
So many questions. ...
No one answers anymore.

Gulishta Jul 2019

Drowning.

Breathing under the water,
Lost in the sea.
One step away from drowning,
But the fire keeps burning.

Losing my mind,
Losing the sanity.
Grasping the straws,
Before I loose reality.

One breath,
One blink,
One smile,
And sink.

No ropes to tie,
No anchor to pull ashore.
No hands out to reach,
No faith left anymore.

The beat of the heart,
Slowing to dull rhythm.
The Love I had for water,
The reason of my Dimiss.