She wakes me up deep in the night.

I understand you, she smiles
snuggling into me, her nose,
pressed cotton soft on my cheek

I have no strength, I cry
not one, for you

I love your weakness
love you for your weakness
her breath wafts into mine

and the boy stuck in his age
floats in the web
of the girl forever
forgiving.

i love you
so savagely
that i pluck
you out
of your roots
only to plant you
in my heart
and water you
with my love
but my love
turns out
to be lacking
so slow
you suffocate
in my ribs
you start
to wither
so i water you
with my blood
my tears
but still
not enough
so slow
you wither
so slow
you die
caged in my heart
i loved you
so savagely
yet my love
you died
.

Some days I am invisible
Some days I am seen
Some days my friends don’t notice me
And some days they are mean

Some days people look at me
When I say something weird
Some days they don’t listen
And some days they don’t hear

Some days people judge me
On everything I wear
Some days they don’t look
Because they don’t even care

Some days people say
That I need mental help
But I bet that they won’t stress
After I’ve killed myself

I have to be ready to run

When the walls come crashing down

I have to be ready to run

When it starts to flutter

I have to be ready to run

At the first hint of trouble

Because if I don't

You'll step all over my heart again

You see the slump in my shoulders
the way I carry myself
the burdens of boulders
that threaten my health.

When you ask what's wrong
I pull up my guard
don't want your pity or sad song
won't tell you why life's hard.

So if you want to know
I'll bottle it inside
wrap up all remains in a black bow
and tell you I'm fine.