I'm loosing my grip of my thoughts
Can't seem to write anymore poems
Now it's hard to express what I feel
Locked, and now it has a seal

Been spontaneous lately
Just wanna do everything lightly
Keeping a slow pace everyday
Vocalizing everything I want to say

Hey, take your time with healing
Hear the angels sing
Meditate quietly, it's calming
Drink tea, it's soothing

Honestly, I'm just mumbling
Looking for peace, I'm searching
I can find it, I'm hoping
With a hopeful heart, I'm praying

I want you near
I need you here
I'm drowned in fear
Answers please, but where?

Midnight thoughts raging
Emotions are brewing
Gentle sound of the rain
Memories that's rushin' in

We're clueless indeed
Where all of this might lead
But we'll take this chance
To fight and make a stance

This can be right or wrong
We can be at bay for so long
Fighting our own demur
Serendipity, hoping it'll occur

Slowly, but surely healing
Pickin' up the pace of it's normal rhythm
Faint but you can hear it sing
This heart's melody and system

Blinding sunlight
Fascinatingly bright
Caught up in the moment
Feels like heavenly sent

Can everyone also see?
Or is it just me?
This picture perfect scenery
Of astounding beauty

I was drawn by their smiles

Thinking of you at night
Makes my heart and mind fight
The darkness of my quiet room
Makes my feelings so gloom

Eyes that's very heavy
Makes my sight so blurry
These feelings inside me
Makes my body so weary

Confused and lonely heart of mine
Can I still see the light shine?
Because my feelings are so blind
My heart and yours are bind

Counting the stars every night
Hoping that everything will be alright
Praying someday, wounds will heal
In God's time and God's will

Tired of my own sorries
Too many apologies
Runnin' in circles
On repeat scenes
You're tired and hurt
I, the one who hurt you first
Drowning with my own guilt
This is the hardest I've ever dealt

Hush my Love,
Hear my heart's throb
Feel my body's warmth
I'll cry in your stead
Feel the comfort that I give
My sincerity you shall receive
It's my farewell indeed
For this precious jewel

If I choose to stay again
Can you guarantee I won't feel pain?
Hardened barrier became very thin
I'm about to make another sin

Slowly awakening old me
Sleepiness vanished by just a mere fragment of thee
Blurred but I'm trying to see
This scenery, is this meant to be?

Like a pixelized screen display
Perfect straight lines but positioned in disarray
Unclear, still don't know what to say
Faint but I can hear my heart that says "Stay."

Words won't come easy
Don't wanna be cheesy
All of these cliche's
Searching for ones niche's

This is my safe haven
But also my struggling place
Expectations that I'm always chasin'
Always puts me in a daze

Careful with every move I make
All of this for everybody's sake
Afraid I might forsake
Always very careful on what I should take

To whom, should I move freely with
To whom, I can take a steady breath
To whom, I can be emotional with
To whom, I can feel truly safe

It took one 'Hi.'
It took one smile
To think 'Okay, let's try.'
Said to myself 'It's been a while.'

I've been afraid,
What if my feelings will fade again?
Don't know where this might lead
I'll just wing it, I'll count one to ten

Realized, that life is about trial and error
The harder you fall, the higher you soar
It can be the other way, but it'll harden your core
You can be another nightmare or someone I adore

I thank you so much
For the love and gift of life
I am very blessed

The sweet words that once came from my mouth
Directed with someone else before everything went south
Now my heart is full of questions and reasonable doubt
I don't know which one is true or what I believe about

Now, I met someone new and he is definitely lovely
I can go everywhere and much more freely
I'm experiencing the same feeling before but much stronger
I hope this time my feelings will stay longer

I hope you're doing well
It was me who tripped and fell
In the past, thou shall not dwell
I'm keepin' this story I won't tell

It's funny how I can no longer write what I feel
Just like before my hand and mind writes with thrill
It feels like my hand has a hidden seal

Every time I cared
I'm gettin' more scared
Realized everything I fear
Is true and that is clear

How can I trust others?
If my roots were the reason behind these tears?
Slowly soaking up this painful reality
Bearing this shameful insincerity

There are a few that I truly trust
That even though I feel a little lost
I know they're always there by my side
And their always there to guide

Now I'm still learning to forgive
I still have a lot to achieve
I have so many goals in mind
Waiting for me to be bind

Like typical whirlwind love stories
It washed away all my worries
Weren't searching but you came
Wishing everything will stay the same

But everything was just wishful thinking
I haven't thought about the pain it'll bring
T'was just 3 days for the both of us
Then the moment came, I had to take the bus

We had to come back to our realities
Bearing in mind all the possibilities
With the lovely memories we shared
And once we both cared

Hey, beautiful soul
You are loved, you are enough
You are very tough

Always left behind
Always seems so blind
In my eyes you're one of a  kind
And someone like you is so hard to find

You move in a mysterious way
I'm always out of words to say
I honestly don't know how to pay
Love and attention you give everyday