You were unexpected.
You were my other half.
Our stories were the same of how we both came to be.
But yet we were different.
...
I lived to be sixteen.
And you weren't even born.
Only 13 weeks into our mother's pregnancy that you were here.
You were going to be the second Capricorn.
We were both produced out of mistakes.
But mother would always say "happy accidents."
Why did you have to leave us?
We had your name picked out, Jonah Sebastian Justice.
But you passed away before hearing it.
Why did you go?
Why did you leave?
I'll still remember hearing that our mother had a miscarriage, I had to work that day. I thought it would help.
It didn't.
But I held through well enough until I got home, can't cry at work.
Why did you die? Why couldn't you have been strong?
I hope you're well now, wherever you are.
I hope you're safe.
I hope you come back.
I hope somewhere, wherever your soul it, that you know and remember who we are.

Jonah Sebastian Justice. July 5th, 2017.

Babe honestly I'm not handling
this world so well without you
There to keep me smiling
and I've tried creeping slowly back into your life
But things just don't feel the same

Why doesn't it all feel the same
?
Baby, please tell me

Highlight all of my mistakes

In the brightest colours

So it all stands out to the crowd
Because I'm picking up the Mic
tonight to scream my love for you out loud
Because baby I can't handle life without you
When you are the one who holds me up,
And I couldn't careless
if people think that I'm weak
Honest to God, I need you with me
To carry on and help mend up
the torn pieces of my heart
I don't want us to keep ripping apart
from one another
Because I'm not handling
this world so well without you.

©2017 Written By Benji James

Unread letters,
Unspoken dreams.
All the words I could've said.
The things I regret,
Yet you know
With out any words being spoken.

You hear the voices.
I hear them too.
The ones that whisper those words,
too deep into the night they’re there.
Too early in the morning they dare not sleep.

You hear the voices,
They’re all in your head.
But their words and actions are true,
they know their place in your life.
And they dare not leave.

You hear the voices,
The ones that scream.
The ones that say awful things,
And keep you awake at night.
They won’t let you go.

You hear the voices,
That ones that laugh.
You shut your eyes in hopes they’ll leave,
But they won’t.
They will always be speaking.

You hear the voices,
They will always be screaming.
Always be laughing and talking.
You may cry, but they’ll never mind.
You’re a captor in their horrible dark world.

My heart is breaking,
The tears are streaming,
My breath is all but gone.

My body shakes,
The sweat takes place,
My tongue is all but dry.

My voice is cracked,
The words that spat,
My misery and despair.

My love you were,
The situation that was,
My forever is all but dead.