You won
I’m just his past
I didn’t even know
We were competing
I didn’t know you existed
I didn’t believe
I could ever lose him
That’s what love does
Blinds you
Makes you believe
You’re in the clear
I swore he’d make his way back
Back to me

You got the man I made
How does that feel?
You should have met him before me
Before I guided him to who he is now
I spent years listening to him
Nights upon nights teaching him
Erasing every insecurity he had
You wouldn’t have believed
You won anything at all
If only you would have known
the boy
I loved

You See
I loved him before
Before you
Before he was smarter, wiser
Before he grew that filter on his mouth
I loved him when he was wild
Reckless
Dramatic
I loved him when he thought
The world would end
if we were apart for just one day

Does he love you like that?
Yeah you won
But that’s not the boy I loved.

I required you to show me
I didn’t know the way
What I couldn’t see
Was your future betray
I was so petrified
I couldn't see just how naive
All emotions magnified
I made myself believe  
Every word you said
But these are just my dreams
Every line unread
Left only with my screams.

Sometimes I feel like this is really it.
Like there will never be a “better day”.
I find myself thinking
Every possibility of happiness and opportunity to smile again is gone
That’s just not true though
I have to remind myself
There’s always another day,
Always a way to make up for the bad things we have done
We can always try and prove to the people we have hurt, that we won’t do it again.
We can always apologize.
There is always someone who loves you. Someone out there fighting for you
Fighting for you to do or be better
Even when you feel like
You are completely alone.
Even when you think nothing good could ever come your way again
Like you’re just out there just floating along, waiting for the next heartbreak.
There is always something better coming.