You have served me well,
You have made me a better human,
You have made me a better me.

You corrected my wrongs,
Picked me up when I fell down,
You shunned people for laughing at me when I hit the ground.

You've comforted me with hugs,
Given me sweet kisses.
You've loved me and granted my wishes.

Although I've used you all my life,
For some good and some bad,
But it's always been honest it's never been a lie.

Then the one time I lied to you,
You wiped my tears away as I cried.

You've never caused me heartache because you've always been you,
I just hope you love me as much as I've always loved you.

She's always been beautiful,
Beautiful to the eyes.
But these poor boys have no idea,
What horrors lie inside.

This unimportant information,
That you seem spread.
You're just like a duck,
Constantly quacking for bread.

You seem to think you're lovely,
But that doesn't seem true.
When I hear the lies you spread,
And all the evil you do.

Other people life's are not your business,
So I think it's best you say nout.
Because your serpent like tongue is causing problems,
So sort yourself out.

I've got that feeling once again,
After staying up til 3 A.M,
When insecurities start to creep,
And I curse myself for lack of sleep.

It seems I have no way of knowing,
Which way my thought process is going,
One day I'm happy, the next I'm glum,
And console myself with smoke and ***.

I try to find a compromise-
Get blasted drunk, and close my eyes,
But the world keeps spinning round and round,
Bottle's empty- no peace found.

Like the Irish airman in the sky,
I seem to watch as other lives flash by,
Then I pass out, hoping I'll never know,
The places those tormented souls must go.

They say that you've gone crazy
And that your mind is in the slum
When you repeat your actions
But you expect a new outcome

I never thought I was insane
Until the day that we first met
You fought me on every little thing
To the point where I got upset

I told you to leave me alone
But you fought me on that too
You said you were only joking around
And that you understood my view

I forgave but didn't forget
Until the next time it came up
We were at each other's throats again
And I wanted to just break up

"But love doesn't quit" you said to me
"You can't just walk away"
Suddenly I felt it was all my fault
And by your side I decided to stay

The fights grew closer and closer
And slowly got more intense
It got so bad that out in public
Strangers came to my defense

They say that you've gone crazy
And that your mind is in the slum
When you repeat your actions
But you expect a new outcome

They say that I've gone crazy
And I guess what they say is true
'Cuz no one seems to understand
Why I keep forgiving you

I woke up this morning to the strangest feeling-
I could feel you next to me.
Not your physical presence of course-
That remains unknown to me
Being, as it may well be,
On the other side of an ocean,
Atop a distant mountain,
Or in a different realm entirely,
Filled with mythical creatures,
In a place where poetry is born.

What I mean is I felt your soul,
Reaching out to me
After last night's late night drinking
In the privacy of my own room,
Come to tell me I was not alone,
Whilst at the same time saying;
"This is not you.
Well...Not the you I'm used to, anyway-
What went wrong?"

I hesitated for a moment,
Considering if this was
My own conscience speaking to me,
In which case it would be acceptable to cry,
But I knew such tenderness could not be my own,
And had no wish for such a beautiful being
To watch tears fall from my eyes.

"I don't know" I said,
And hated myself instantly for the lie.
This awe-inspiring soul, who had travelled so far
To share such a wondrous presence with me,
What right had I to feed it such ugly untruths?
I felt ashamed and hung my head...
"I hate myself." I said.

For a moment I thought you had left,
Sickened by this display of self-pity,
And my ghastly morning breath.
Then I realised you had enveloped the entire room.
In an attempt to bring me comfort.
You had filled the cracks in the door,
And surrounded each wall
From ceiling to floor,
And waited for me to speak.

I cried fully for five minutes at least,
And there was no beauty in it.
No gentle tears or quiet sniffling.
Just heaving sobs and ugly ****** contortions,
Interspersed with heavy breathing,
And snotty tissues.

When it was all over
I felt you on my shoulder
(Not my heart- you accepted, you afterwards said,
That I keep some parts hidden,
Even from myself), and then
We talked, and talked, and talked,
About everything, until I felt
We were only words- nothing more.
Not voices, or sounds, or written letters,
But just words who understood each other perfectly.

Finally, you explained to me
How to reach you, but, being a soul,
Your directions were untranslatable,
And I could not follow them
Despite my burning desire to,
So you went on instead
To reveal the purpose of your visit.

"Your soul is trapped." you told me,
"Within the confines of your body,
And I must travel so very far to see it.
It is the only part left of you
That still loves itself, and if it leaves
It is afraid that you will die."

I had never given a thought, before,
To my own soul, and how
I must have been keeping it,
Trapped under lock and key
Behind my own self-loathing,
While it yearned to be free.

So as you left I promised you this;
That I would learn to love myself,
So that my soul may find eternal bliss,
And find you in good health.

I assure you, beautiful one,
That I am trying...

She doesn't read my poetry,
And throws away my stuff.
She cannot stand my music,
I think I breathe too much.

The bile I stutter from my tongue,
Is nothing compared to hers.
She's a wasp and I am stung,
But she's only using her words.

The selfishness she commandeers,
It does nothing but hurt me so.
As she cuts her skin destroying herself,
She only let's me know.