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Aiswarya Apr 2017
They say people come and go,
When they go,
It is meant to teach you a lesson,
But when the consequences faced are more than the lessons learnt,
It is not okay to wish you never had met them in the first place?
Aiswarya Dec 2017
Love me right
And I'll be the shooting star
In your empty galaxy
Aiswarya May 2018
I thought loved needed to hurt
Until I met him
Aiswarya Dec 2017
i was upset
you left my words hanging
you left my heart exposed
you left my clothes untouched
you left my skin un-savoured

i was upset
you left me

i tried to fill those words
to stitch that heart
and my clothes, couldn't get any other man to touch it

i was upset
so i left myself
#suicide
Aiswarya Apr 2017
You said you love me,
But,
I meant it more-without even saying it
Aiswarya Mar 2017
I bring myself closer and closer until I can smell his breath and breathe his smell
Aiswarya Feb 2017
I try and convince myself,
No- you’re not there,
You’re not in my heart,
Because I want to believe you’ve never managed to get there, in the first place.

Then I see that slit,
That slit- on my wrist, that reminded me of the time I tried to cut you out of my mind,
But I couldn’t
So I tried and cut my soul away from its home instead.

That was when I realised,
That this life,
Isn’t really worth living without you.

**I love you
Aiswarya May 2017
Falling for you wasn't the scariest
But knowing I wouldn't be able to fall into another man's arms - so perfectly,
just like I sunk in yours - did
Aiswarya Oct 2016
I want to lose my breath when I meet you,
I want the world to pause when our eyes meet,
I want to act as if my heart isn’t erupting like a volcano,
Because I want you to lose your mind,
I want to steal every part of you,
Until you lose yourself.

I’ll secretly cuss every mademoiselle you talk to,
But deliberately surround myself around blokes,
Even the laundryman if that makes you jealous,
Because oh boy,
The thought of you wanting me,
Feeds my emotions like no other.

I would say no when you ask me to marry you,
I’ll promptly walk away like I don’t owe you a single explanation,
Because that’s when you chase me,
Like I’m the baton to your race,
Because that’s when you grab me by my waist,
And my curves would finally make sense,
Because they’ll lock with your hands,
Because that’s when you kiss me,
And we merge,
We become one.
Aiswarya Feb 2017
Those who have it- doesn´t want it,
Those who want it- doesn’t have it,
Those who had it- regrets it,
Those who never had it- craves for it.

What is it you ask?
It´s called love my friend.
Aiswarya Nov 2016
So, much pain,
So, much pain a woman has to go through,
We give, and give, and give,
But in return,
We bleed, and bleed, and bleed,
Both,
Internally and externally,
Both,
By strangers and loved ones.

We are asked, and asked, and asked,
Asked to give,
Asked to do,
Asked to stop.

Asked to give our dignity,
Ask to do tasks, more than our body can handle,
Asked to stop believing, we,
Have a future,
A future,
That involves euphoria, and tranquility,
But in reality,
It’s just, pain and hurt and abuse and, non-stop, unconsented ***,
****.

When,
Will, it end?
When?
When will we be permitted human rights?
When can our daughters, go out during the night, or even the day, without the fear of being robbed their home and dignity,
When can we women not be blamed for others invading parts of our body that we didn’t ask for, that fits manhood,
When will we stop being tools that prove masculinity,
When will we be granted wings to fly so high, without the fear of being ogled at all of us that shakes,
Again something we, never, did ask for.

When can we be human?
When can I be human?
When can I be my dad,
When can I be my brother,
When can I be my husband,
When can I be that stranger,
That male stranger there,
When can I be treated equally as men?
You
Aiswarya Jan 2020
You
There was a time in life when I thought there was no one
No one- to love me
I gave so much
Just so much that it was overwhelming enough not to receive any in return

Then there was you
You who were so unexpected
so different so …
So wanted

Your smile
Your glances
Your stares... were just tasty
Tasty in a way that I could feel them
Feel them in my mouth before I even tasted you- fully

With you I didn't hold myself back
In fact I threw myself to you
I wanted you
I wanted your hands on me
But most importantly I wanted your hands on my soul
I wanted you to hold my soul between your rough masculine palms
Because I knew
With you it would be the safest

And now that you have it in your very... bare...hands
I hope you would hold on to it
Because I feel our souls have connected
Connected in a way that science cannot possibly explain

Because science cannot… in any way...explain the way you look into my eyes while you touch me
Or could science explain the way your face flushes pink while you kiss me hard enough that I...
I just... can’t breath
Or
Could science...could science ever explain why I...fell for you?

You have so much of power over me
By choice
By my...choice
But at this point I can't take it back even if I wanted to
Because
I love you...
I love you
You
Aiswarya May 2017
You
I couldn't make you fall for me
But I also couldn't make myself fall for anyone else

I stumbled all the way
I ended up falling in pain
You
Aiswarya Oct 2016
You
Stop screaming,
Stop screaming your name in my ears,
Stop repeating those lovely hopeful things you said in my head,
The things  you said that obviously didn’t mean a single thing to you.

Just leave,
You’re 3092358992633 km away,
But you’re always hovering,
You’re dead to me but so alive in mind,
Or,
Or at least- in my heart.

I try to move on,
I meet this bloke,
This tall handsome smart yet humble gentleman,
But the thing is,
He doesn’t scream,
He doesn’t hover,
He doesn’t love,
Or at least he doesn’t love like you do.

I love you,
But you left,
Now I’m just one of those you’ve loved,
But here I am,
Yielding to every single part of you,
Burning my soul,
Just to say this,
I still love you
I will,
Forever.
Aiswarya Oct 2016
Being lonely isn’t a bad thing after all,
I get to sit and ponder about how much better I deserve,
Ponder about all the times I degraded myself,
Ponder about all the times I was blinded by my love for you,
That I find it disgusting and worst of all petrified to even think about.

It took me long enough to realise you leaving wasn’t the worst thing that could possibly happen,
All the times I spent crying by the window staring at the empty sky wondering if God’s watching,
Even questioning or to be precise rebuking God for stealing my loved one.
Then came the day I stopped doing so,
The day I realised he didn’t steal my loved one,
He did not steal my loved one because you-you were not my loved one,
You didn’t deserve to be.



I deserve better,
I deserve to be sunk in love- not drowned
I deserve to be touch by passionate hands and not itchy ones,
I deserve better,
and you,
you deserve nothing but sympathy,
my sympathy for you that you can’t love,
you can’t love like me,
you can’t feel like me,
you can’t be me.  

You,
You deserve nothing.
Aiswarya Nov 2018
Everytime you touch her
My skin swells with goosebumps
Because even then
I feel your skin more than she does

-Aiswarya-

— The End —