My greatest fear
Is becoming a woman that needs a man to survive

My greatest fear
Is that you'll wake up one day and you won't need me anymore

My dreamscape bound in hawser ..
Work shirts and trousers  , hemmed from burlap medium and means ..  
Proud sons , stubborn mules , afternoon steam fought its ******* of fresh turned earth and clay , the tedium of harrow and harness ..
Time alone beneath hardwood with Bible , fig , the covenant of God and man. The relaxing sun would mark the close of day ..

Sometimes at night i get these visions in my head...
Visions which torment me in my sleep...
Visions of a life not lived
Dreams not chased
Risks not taken
Fears not dispeled
Efforts not put in
Love not fought for
Battles not finished
Words not said
Things not done
A life not lived to it's potential

I get these horrifying nightmares
I see myself growing old
All alone withering like a leaf in the winter of my life
Not a single soul by my side
No one to care for me
No one to even bother about me
Whether i live or die
It don't make no difference to no one
I don't see no hope
Only doom and despair
This crazy sense of guilt and regret just overpowers my senses
I weep profusely
But have nobody to lean on
I see myself drowning in my tears
My soul is bleeding from all sides
Nothing can cure it now

I sometimes fear that these visions might come true
And i'd rather die than live a life like that
I want to make a promise to myself
I will do everything i can to make sure that my life is nothing like these visions i keep having every now and then
I will fight
I will survive
Someday i will flourish
Someday i will blossom
God willing...i will fulfill every single dream i have

The connections we make in this life are precious. Perhaps the most valuable commodity available to us. It's very brave of you to openly admit that you are afraid to put your heart on the line. There are a good deal of people who will tell you if the one you are writing about harms you or does wrong to you that you are too good for them. I propose this question to you. What if you were to confront the basis for your fear and tell yourself that whatever it may be is something you have since overcome and are superior to? And if you haven't then certainly with time and perspective you will. Writing is an excellent channel for this kind of emotion and you will watch as your experiences flow into your writing relieving of you all your torment and fear to be replaced with courage. A courage to think about yourself as worthy of others love, as everyone innately was born to be. It is only through fear that we isolate ourselves, blame ourselves, and live in inferiority. What makes anyone truly special or more deserving of love than another? Not a thing, and any one who would contest this is openly admitting that they are the very same creatures who struggle with the same fear as everyone else. I say this to you as one stranger to another.

I love you
not because
you're good looking

I love you
not because
you're caring

I love you
not because
you dote on me

I love you
not because
your smiles are sweet

I love you
not in lust
of your crevice
or orifice
or skin

I love you
because
without you
I feel

incomplete within.