My thoughts have become my vision
I don't need eyes to see anymore
I can think of one singular thing that divides into multiple
Thoughts
They control me
And I don't know
If I need to see anymore
If they know what's coming next
Why should I
I can just hide
Hide alone
And let them consume me
They always seem to be right

- Anxiety

i feel so still
everything around me is moving
but i am not
i am present
but i don’t know to what point

it seems like i have watched my life live without me
i do things but am i experiencing it enough?
to what point can i just observe and watch time

i see children running outside
the movement of their legs are so fast
i'm thinking about time again
their laughter can brighten up the world

yet i feel so still
yet everything around me is moving

so the pain stopped
it wasn't just the pain though
it was everything altogether
the world is just so still now
you made everything move
my limbs
my heart
and now here i am
wishing i could move again
can you please make me move?
the stillness is getting boring now

my time is almost up
and i still do not know
where the happiness is

i’m understanding how it feels to love someone who doesn’t know you even exist
but i see you
i look at many people but i don’t see anything
i wonder what the sky says about you
i wonder if they miss you up there
when i look up at the sky
i count the stars
it makes me feel insignificant
and you make me feel more than that
because that’s all i will ever be in your eyes
insignificant
but in mine

you are everything.

He painted a big white cloud over me
he was careful with his brush strokes
painting each line with softness
yet his hand was bruised
when that hand connected to my face
it wasn't so gentle anymore
the white cloud started to turn grey
he was careful with his strokes