Things are getting bad again
It was a long time coming
I try to escape it
But I’m tired of running
Things are getting bad again

How can I outlive this ghost?
How do I know it’s not me?
They say there are things
Lurking in the deep you can’t see
And there are some things we must be
Befriend the ghost

Things are getting bad again
We came down this road
Potholes, sinkholes, dead ends
Rerun and rewatch the episode
Things are getting bad again

Just a matter of time
Like I said before
Like they forewarn
Flirting with It so obscure
I am running out of time
Then in the nick,
I make it out — barely alive

Things are getting bad again

i've always wanted to die
ever since 4th grade
even when i'm happy
i'm nonexistent if dead
so why be alive?
but i breathe instead
in this cozy grave i made
i just don't wish to transfer my pain
so i keep inside of my veins

but as i grow older,
my bones frail
love feels colder
sing "sweet nightingale"
makes me a bit bolder,
it's easier to bail
with a devil on my shoulder
demons drift me off to hell

i was frozen
you broke me free
that wasn't the life i've chosen
dragged me out to sea
you should've drowned me

we die as we are born,
vulnerable and torn
you create too much,
leave people in the dust
we live as we die
smile and cry
it's not worth this
life isn't a gift but
i'm too scared to drift

back to sea

you'll always live in the margins of my mind
you rushed me into the light
then left me behind
now it's cold and dark
i try to light a fire,
but i can't without your spark
i'm in love with a liar

you came in my life abruptly
the grandest entrance
when i fell in love with you,
i didn't know it was a life sentence
'cause you'll never love me
maybe that's meant to be
maybe you not loving me saved me

I expected so much more
I learned you're not who I thought
Now I'm not who I was before
I don't want a love that's bought
I expect so much more

My hands are shaking
My heart is racing
My feet are pacing
They think I'm faking

My bones turn to stone
It's all I've ever known
My muscles atrophy
Pain got the best of me

It's invisible and deceitful
Failures made me cynical
Solutions are only temporary
This body of mine is the enemy

Inflammation spreads like wildfire
I'm tired of being so tired
Nothing stops the torture, but
I'm fighting like a soldier

My body rebels
It is a prison cell
Trapped in my own hell
Gunshots fire inside
I really have tried

i'm merely a mosaic of broken glass
slow hands, delicacy is all i ask
are you up for the task?

your flowers have bloomed beautifully
now you can dream peacefully in your sleep
without your demon's interrupting scream

i once was fragmentary
until you put me back in one piece
until you pieced me back together
never asked to be a normal being
now i don't recognize a thing about me

no longer a mosaic,
just shattered glass

we brag about our influences
second chances, we are romantics
i want a smaller globe
do you always do what you're told?
that's unfamiliar to me
colliding philosophies

if you try to please everybody,
you'll never yourself be pleased
harmony can be a disease

When everyone runs back and forth,
I am your true north

I'm afraid how the pendulum will swing
If you'll hate me in the day and love me at night
'Cause no matter what, I can't get it right

Even though you left for better things,
I'll be waiting for the pendulum to swing