I tried to fix what was broken
And became upset when I couldn't.
I left it alone,
I let it be,
I even changed me.
Some worked and some didn't..
Now, I must admit it
My errs have made me shameful
Because my intentions were so good;
But I was blinded, so blinded,
That I never really understood
How I could ***** anyone over
The way I did.

I turned a new leaf
And still I couldn't succeed
Because all anyone ever really saw
Was the old me

I set new boundaries and was shunned
So I opened them up and now I'm lost

I went back to the old me,
And even that ******* me.
So what do I become?
What do I do?
Because the old me
And the new me
Wasn't ever good enough for any of you.

I remember sitting on the floor,
Arms wrapped around me.
Bawling my eyes out
Wondering why I'm crying,
Thinking what's wrong with me?
This isn't reality.
Now I look back and realize,
It was real.
It was abuse.
Nothing was wrong with me,
Except for being used.

A telltale sign,
I now see.
The problem wasn't even me.
Angry with what has happened
But elated because...
Now I'm free,
Effortlessly,
Drifting on a breeze,
Of such sweet release.
I have to say
God bless me
And everything that tried to break me
That in itself amazes me

💙

Written,
by me...

Rebecca