i’ve barely slept,
i’m running on adderal and self loathing,
a mix that has kept me alive for far too long.
i’ve barely slept,
i want you to kiss me until our lips are bruised and touch me hard enough that traces of your fingertips can still be seen on my skin.
i’ve barely slept,
i miss the feeling of someone’s mouth on my neck,
the feeling of gentle kisses starting at my collarbone and falling lower and lower and lower.
i’ve barely slept,
i’m running on adderal and self loathing,
when what i really need is to find my relief in you.

Your eyes sang the song of loss
And I recognized the chorus

Logically
I know my professed
Feelings for you
Cannot possibly be true
I’m just a stranger
Behaving strangely
Believing in some fake
Wanna be my destiny
And instead of realizing what a fool I be
I’m delusionally
Thinking
“Well, this is his effect on me”
Day by day
This I see
I mean nothing to you
And I don’t know what you mean to me
But it cannot possibly be
What I think I can see
And the things I think I feel
I must accept they aren’t real
If they were of any value
You would surely feel them too
Vapors of feelings
I pretend to be true
Whispers on winds
About birds and bees
Heard only by trees
Repeated by their leaves in the breeze
Sent to a man
Who doesn’t speak
The language of trees

It's been a while, hasn't it?

I sometimes wonder
If you remember me at all,
Beneath your stressful days
And endless nights.

Do you remember me?

I have hidden here,
Waiting
Just for you.

Because I am you.

You are not the girl I used to know,
Not the one you used to be.
But that's okay,
I have changed too.

Have we both grown by leaps and bounds?

I wish you all the best,
But please
I beg of you.

Do not forsake me.

I see you
I see me
Not being chosen
I see you having more fun
I see you walk by in your seducing scarlet jumpsuit casuallly dismissing me
I see your lips with a dark shade of  maroon moving and not a single moment of silence
I see your hazel brown eyes not even glancing  towards me
I see the red-brown of your hair but they face me
I see your long silver earings dangling and shaking as you laugh
I see the golden bracelets in your hand  slide back as you tie your hair
I see you
I see me
                             All alone