Do you really understand my words
What can I say that is not twisted truth

The flowers spurt forth from the ground
But they do not burst into bloom in one day

They will grow slowly and then before my eyes
The colors they will spread and create a lovely head

The leaves that float are dying now
The gracefully fall from bows above

Blown by God's breath so sweet and soft
Carrying promises high and aloft

We wait on your timing oh clock of the world
We wait for your voice we want to hear your word

I am small like a grain of sand
I cannot stand without your hand

I fall and am embraced by cold dark earth
Huddled in a silent berth

Try as you might
You will not bleed me dry
Not of my love

he is coals, almost unburning

I, grass, covered in dew

we lay, in the earth

until the sun makes us new

Cover your mouth when you sneeze
Hold your breath and forget how to breath

A fallen bridge over troubled waters
Simple nights with death's daughters
A drowned out cry for light
But it vanished into the nights
****** hands and stained towels
Empty woods and dark hallows
A candle flame put out by ghosts
Evil words raised like a toast
A dreadful plea for the end
But who knows what the day will send

Do not tell me my father is trying
I do not know this man
I can only wonder
Why did he wait
I begged him
To look at me
Not even to love
Just to see
How could you not know
One day I would be a woman
I thought I would be
Everything you were not
When I look in the mirror
I am your reflection
Everything you are
Your anger burned into my voice
Your strength in my fist
You gave me this fire
It burns me up from the inside
I hear you
Echo in my head
Do not tell me
You are trying
Because when I tried
Begged, pleaded, asked
You turned me away
For 25 years I waited
For you to do better
For me to be enough
To separate myself from the desire
To make you proud
Of that, I will never be worthy
This is not my deepest wound
It is one that will scab over
I will pick at again and again
To watch it bleed
It is your blood in my veins

Has the sun set yet
We have so little time
To make peace with the day
After your soft touch
I will never feel whole
I am bleeding out
Where your fingers reached
Inside my soul
Where does the time go
When I am dreaming next to you

The shadows are the same size
Your eyes have just become more adept

There once was a body of water that ran
All among the mountains and up to a ****
A clean clear river of simple pleasure
But it was worth more than all your treasure
But darkness fell to that land
And the I had no water to hold in my hand
The people cried "Oh, rain gods come and fill our stream"
But all in haste they decided we must sacrifice our Queen
Soul for soul and blood for water
Just one life to slaughter
But love of her people and her kin
Could not stop her from shaking within
A long trek to highest peak
And there they saw the remains of their creek
But a trickle of dew in the mud
And soon it would be mixed with sacrificial blood
On the alter the lady was lain
But all their hopes were killed in vain
The knife was raised and dropped like a stone
And on that day no sun shone
Her tears crept down in silent pools
To give life to these poor fools
And as you watch and as they wait
The tears of love and tears of fate
The rain racing to the bank
And the people fell and began to thank

I have so much stuff
On my mind
So many words
Out of her mouth
And this heart is heavy
Like a mountain
Hanging over the moon
Every breath and gentle whisper
Crushed in his hand
And as I come
To the feet of Jesus
I surrender, my family
To you.
Whatever the end
No matter the cost
I will pay, because you paid
And you pour
A steady stream, of life
Into me, over my life
Immeasurable blessings
Flow from you
And your Spirit fills me
I am drawn
Into your glory
Filled, with your purpose
Direction from your word
Carries me, into battle
And away from the lies
To rest in your grace
Is to know love
Unconditional.

It was a good three minutes
I smiled for about half that time
And my pride was overflowing
When I realized
That all that was inside
No matter how awful
Never found its way
To be traced upon my skin
This time.
And that is something
I will be eternally grateful for
Feel free to congratulate me
Because this my friends
Is an achievement
Deserving of a medal

Is your humility a crown or a carpet

Can I ask you
To filter air gently
Through your lungs
Before you release it
Into my mouth
I will devour you one day
We will burn
Like the sun when she finally dies
Big, and bright, and beautiful
You have never felt the cold before
I would not believe ice existed
After I feel
The warmth of your touch
Burn through me
Peeling back my layers
Until we come to center
I’ve got you
Right where I want you
Under my skin
Burrow into my soul
She longs for you
Like a breath of fresh air

like a dope addict
no matter what the cost
I still always come back
to you
for more of my high

You have fallen to your knees
Who will teach you to walk the line when I am faded
When I am burnt out

I was playing with pyromaniacs
Pyromaniacs playing with fire
Fire leading them along
Fire teaching them to dance
Undulating their whole body
Letting fear find their fingers
Fear bind their tongues
Some lessons no sooner learnt than forgotten
This one not among them

She is not lost
She who runs hell
She who dances naked in the halls
With thorns pressed into her hands
Grasping at roses not yet bloomed

You press on my bruises
Wishing for them to bleed
Have you never met shooting stars
The ones the sky let's rule for a solitary moment,
the earth's candle wishes

This is the way fire dances
A soul barren of burden
Though she claim all your possessions
And bite the tongue behind your teeth
You will not remember, what held so little light
A tender bite with a wild appetite

Am I really pretty
You say I'm beautiful
Is it just a mask I wear
To hide the fear

My hair is long and true
But it shields my face from you
Maybe I cant handle the pressure
Maybe I don't want the lecture

I want a touch soft and gentle
In a world so elemental
Watch my faces see the lines
Untie that ropes that hold and bind

I have no peace in me tonight
I have waged this war against all my days
It wearies me as never before
I fight with words
Yet you have lain such a seige against me
With the fire licking flames from off your tongue
My gates, they will not hold
I will succumb to the fire and she will burn me up from the inside
As if I were made of dry kindling and oil

The thought of smoke fills my lungs
I bite the back of a cigarette like it was a shell between my teeth
She tastes of death and the promise of hope
It is just a thought
Yet it eats away at me as if it were a famine

Still there is no peace to be found
Not in the palm of either of these fists
Or in the dreams that will pass through my sheets tonight
Oh that you would find a quiet thought that I could hold
To change the way the world creeps into my mind while I sleep

No peace for me tonight

Love doesn't hurt
Love doesn't hit

Then why did you tell me it did
I chose to believe
And you chose to leave

I am left alone stranded in a tree
With no one here to comfort me

I WILL NEVER GIVE UP ON YOU*
You don't have to do anything
You don't have to change
I just want you to be
Without feeling strange

Want you to laugh
And not hold your breath
Want you to cry
Till no tears are left

You can feel better
Without all the sleeves
Just take your time
I won't ever leave

I guess she thought it was okay
To let me know her in that way
I think she knew the intent
And the way my heart was spent
How circumstances change a view
And love sometimes clouds your view
The tears fell like water over a sodden face
I never knew that this could take its place
I was told dreams are made of dust from a star
But mine are made of earthly things not quite so far
They brought a dream of the kind type
It wasn't enough though, to bring light
Like a an heir to a throne you left your kingdom
And me behind, to fight the war
A war I could never win alone
But hey that is what soul mates are for
Forget dreams and remember me
Shut the gates and throw away the key
Just love me now, and until tomorrow
We will forget the sorrow
For today is its own and you are mine
And will dance forever even if it is only a short time

It was as if you were my broken heart
How did you know to be everything that I felt
Yet what am I with you
That I am not without
We mourn in our hearts for the earth when she loses a beautiful soul
Still spring comes each year
Only to birth flowers that will fade into the soil
Yet if our pockets are full so quickly do we wipe away our tears
As quickly as the petals face the sun

While you were not in season
It would be a lie born on my lips to say you were not my reasoning
I have buried these things in my stomach with a heavy heart
Why do these fleeting thoughts weigh so much
I am a fool to carry them with me to all the places that I know
Cursing the ground as I walk that they know the way so well

What delusion is this that I would find comfort in that which brings me pain
I bear all things
For what
It brings me no honor to be a wallflower
This is my folly to keep the seat I have for you in my heart warm
This trickle of time will soon be a current and we are swept up in our worries as never before
Oh when things were simple
Between you and I
If only I had lived my life in those days
These regrets are nothing
This shame like a burn from the sun on my face

How I carry on now
With my face to the ground
A wanderers plight
A restless soul
I have exiled myself in my own way
I have no courage to find my way back
The familiarity burns into me
Even as this day dies before my eyes

When tomorrow comes
My feet hit the dirt long after the rising of the sun
I will walk the way I have gone before
Though still I hope one day
It will lead me back to you
I know I am walking in circles
That's just what broken hearts do
With nothing to feed this hope
I walk in circles, trying to find you

When I am in deeper waters
You can swim my body back to shore
Know my spirit is still treading
In the depths

I said I loved you
If only for the reason
That when I looked in your eyes
That was when I heard music

You do not fear the trees
You fear the forest in the dark
The rustle of leaves you did not make
The wind in your ears you did not fake
You breath smoking against the crispness of the air
Cold existence, creeping into your lungs
Fingers not yet numb
Clutching at sanity
As it slips into the dark

Breakups are like being an angel in heaven

And no longer do I hear your voice beckon

Then so suddenly I am quickly falling

And still your voice is not calling

To a dry and mortal place unknown

But the worst part is that I am now alone

My wings have been ripped from between my shoulders

They fall in fire to the earth, where they smoulder

So they burn in a fire that just gets hotter

And my questionable soul thirsts for water

Almost as hungrily as my heart searches for your love

You know you will never again look down from the stars above

Yet now I am bound to this desolate earth

Cast out from the skies to a humbler berth

And so we try to survive in a world of desolate silence

For I cannot find your peace among all this violence

before the golden un-woken dawn
I stand measureless in time
the days unknown mysteries
in strands start to form
the un-dried dew in the grass rises
to create tendrils of life
the birds unanswered cry
sings forth into light
the uncapped ocean tides
reach for the mornings promise
in all the unviewed beauty
nothing is ever lost
in this undefiled moment
it doesn't come with a cost

Your words are sharp
Like a two edged blade
The people I hurt
The choices I made
The words you speak
Are not set in stone
But if you speak anymore lies
You will stand alone
And it is my death
You will have to atone

From all of the mortals below perspectives
You seemed to run so slow across the sky

For it was a dance of an eternity
A moment in the night of your life

And so you took your sweet time
As you ascended among the stars

To be the beautiful light we watch
You blushed red, from all the attention

And hid behind your neighbor
But with a gentle light you glow

So well you know your journey
So beautifully you dance

And as those of this earth looked on
You dared to take a glance

Every eye beneath the stars
Was yours to consume

And in each of the iris's
You saw a shinning full moon

You silently left
As tears streamed down my face
I was left in the light
But the only bright part of me was my shadow

I couldn't hide my face from the sun
I thought that you would be the one
You are gone
I feel just so empty

I cant understand why you left me
You say find someone else
But all I want is you
I don't understand how my world could just break

You said you were protecting me
You said you couldn't hurt me
But not hurting me hurts me even more
I am different without you

You completed my world
Now I am left missing my most importance piece
You, you held me together
And when you held me in your arms I could fly

But now I've lost my wings and you are the one who has drifted to another shore
I am empty here standing behind your locked door
You shut me out
I just walked away

Not knowing how to feel
Not knowing what to say
The silence isn't awkward it is just lonely
I cant hear your voice and when I do it doesn't sound the same

You are perfect and always will be
But now I am broken and don't think I can be fixed
I don't bend I only break
Why couldn't you hold on for goodness sake

It wasn't worth it
I have so many questions
Do you have the answers
Walking away is never the right thing do to

Sometimes the hardest things in life
Are the right choices
Sometimes the right thing
Is also the wrong

Its all about perpective
But no matter what way I look at it
I still hurt inside
The tears are made of water

But all I feel is knives
You tore me apart
And skinned me alive
It burns its bleeds

But it still beats strong
This is how I feel when you are gone gone gone

You are a smokey memory
It brings a light to my eyes to think of you
What could I say to the leaving of my life
To ask you to come back home
Would mean everything to the shallowness I wallow in
Mindful in my retreating
It does very little for a wandering mind and stationary feet
I have found my humility in begging gods dead and lost alike
Though wherever I find them it seems their ears have been shut with the worries of the world
This storm has stamped my skin and the ink runs wild in my veins
Time will check its reigns
A wanderer is never lost
A spirit restless never sleeps
This to shall pass
I bite empty promises into my lip
I dig a grave for my stamina into the palms of hands with my nails
There is such an emptiness to be found in tomorrow
Your hope for her is not a dangerous one
Yet we forget the wisdom of yesterday as quickly as she is lived
Oh the mutterings of my mind
It is worth pennies in the street

When a heart breaks it doesn't split in to
And your mother cant fix it not with glue
I don't want chocolate or any other food
I don't want to come across as rude

I just need love and I need time
I broke my heart when I signed the dotted line
I crossed on a broken bridge
And was left falling from a ridge

I fell long and I fell hard
And when I hit the bottom I saw stars
I didn't hear your voice cause I was all alone
I fell hard just like a sinking stone

I was trapped in a room no window or door
And I curled into a ball and slept on the floor
I lay like that for a long time
Like a sleeping mime

I was kept in a box
No key no lock
I need to escape
Without a single scrape

I cut my arms
I bruised my legs
I hurt my heart
And burned my head

Its all your fault I'm not okay
I didn't think love would end this way

I die while I wait
Every moment a bit of life
Extinguished
Like the flame of a candle
Slowly sinking to the earth
Wreathed in light
Yet reduced to darkness
And so the demons rise
In the blankness
You have been found lost
Yet you must just say the words
To be taken home
But so still you stay
Alone

Just another day on the other side
I travel here so quickly
I have nothing to hide

I told you my dreams were made of glass
But you ripped them to shreds like paper
You knew my heart was on a string
And yet you let me go
Flown away like a kite in the wind
You dropped me down stairs
And left me in my nightmares
No rescue from a lonely soul
My heart was strong but it knew no love
Until I saw you, we had a romance
Of the summer and sunsets and butterfly kind
You watched me learn to love
Like a baby learns to walk
Simple steps, hesitant at first
But then all at once
Yet when I fell, you would always catch me
The tears I cried for you, you wiped away
With gentle midnight kisses
But a dream in the day
So quickly turns to night
And sleep did not come
Only howls of the wolves
Like a vampire you bit
Into my soft skin
And I let you bite
So I could feel you within
I gave you my all and whatever was left
But you had already taken some
Now you took what was left
There is nothing for the next
No new tomorrow
Only pain and a sad sorrow
A gentle cry a long scream
The anguish of a broken heart
From the one who played its part

Some seem to grow hearts on trees
They nurture them before they break open the hard packed earth
Singing to make them grow, like a witches melody
They want the tree to rise higher
To bloom in full feelings, emotions and dreams
Yet some trees are poisoned the fruit they bear is dark
Blood mixed with ink and all the broken promises
Other are bright as golden wishes and strong sunlight
Some may be shriveled, they had love to make them grow
But bye and bye they slowly let it go
Others look still so tempting to the eye
That you would wish to pluck it and eat it in one bite
But if you saw the inside you would know it wasn't right
No heart was perfect but each felt the world just the same
Each loved light, loved love, and hated pain
It is a big wonder how so many different hearts
Could come from the one and same tree
It is a small wonder though they grew these all
Yet no one gave one to me