What's the right way to say I'm emotionally unavailable.
You can't have them because they only swim in my ink.
Like a flurry of scribbled words on the back of my napkin.
All the love and pain right there.
"I need you back".

There is a realization to be had when you come to miss the feeling more than the person. When it was never about the person to begin with.

If it wasn't the person... How do I find it again?

I always fell in love too hard too fast.
I guess I let it flood out and now I've got no reserves.

I can't even force it long enough to imagine you next to me. "I don't love you."

Will I even recognize it when Its at my doorstep again.

You always hear of those people who say they are broken and think, how could you be? It's not until you find the shattered peieces hiding behind the door that you see how it really is.

I wish there was a human handbook to repair a heart. DIY heart repair.

I seem to win hearts.. But all I end up doing is resending the prize.

Don't stop tying right? I wonder how many battle fields I'll wander today...

Paranoia increasing, these faces ,they take me. Reality missing, I'm away in my grave. I see them,  by the railroad tracks. Lined up one by one, closer i command. My spirit , haunts them, one by one I command. Inch by inch on that track. Their legs sit on the tracks. As my train of revenge makes me smile. Sounds of ripping skin, cracking bones. Their screams make up for all my frightful moans, as a child they tore me apart. I screamed, I cried. Now I laugh, at the blood they leave. Their terror is just one of my missing peieces of joy. Now I sit fat, like after thanksgiving feast.Filled and feed by their hell, their torture. Oh you sick molesters , it's not over, I will be hungry again for more of your pain. Smiling a hurt boy, can now smile.