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Keith W Fletcher Jan 2016
As I came through the door
Taps the cat  meowed at me
As she crisscrossed the floor space
Staying a foot ahead of me
Glancing into the big closet or tiny room
Whichever ... Dad called it his study
"Hey dad " I yelled at the back of his head
" His quick glance meant "hey buddy"
I noticed moms face on the computer screen
'Oh!"I snapped " mom ... Hey we miss you "
"I'm not talking to your crotch "she laughingly barked
"Sit down ... Move the camera or move your *** Trent"
I compromised by doing all three as dad took a break
The face of someone I truly loved sat there
Looking at me
From over  three thousand miles away.
Three thousand miles away!
"Hey baby " she said in her cooing voice " How are you?"
"Got a job at Dannerlans ... Part time" I proudly engaged
"Don't let it interfere with" ...she couldn't stop and she knew...
I guess my stupid grin finally clued her in as she trailed off
"Half a world away and I'm still mom I guess. Dad musta.."
"He did ... Same thing.. And I won't. But what are you...."
"Don't you dare Trent " mock rage crossed her  face
As a few octaves fell out of her voice and I already knew
Here it comes.....a tsunami all the way from Japan
Putting my nose right to the camera and pushing on
I repeated "tsunami mommy  tsunami mommy  san
What can you do about it . you're way over there and I'm..."
" Gonna get it so bad .. When I get home mister "
:You're gonna look end up looking just like your sister"
"Oh ....Kay...  "I haltingly bounced her words round my mind
"I DONT HAVE A SISTER."
"Exactly"
Then I saw it... Set up and now....
Confusion and pride had my ammunition... just the facts
Dad arrived at that second with a coke for me and his beer
"Did you hear her ?" I asked him
" threating to make me a girl"
As I gave up the chair I heard that cooing soft voice sorta ....
..........GR OO ooowl ?!? While still softly cooing  "oh no no no...
Too good for you Bud...Buuud...Buddy?   You'll just disa..pear!"
Dad laughed first - drawing me in as I reluctantly let go.
"Nice try dear.... but you lost it coming round the outside corner"
What do you mean outside corner ..it was right over but too low
"Bye mom"  I said "got some homework to do " they were merged
Gone now for three month and three more to go .poor dad
His staunch had wilted within forty eight hours of her departure
But let's all pretend that you
never noticed the droop -a bit sad
Poor poor  dad ... Poor poor dad  I chimed as I climbed the stairs
He won't make it another three months . .. Very easy
I  haltingly caught my words as the downer that they were
As I scooped the elegant Taps  from the floor " but they'll make it "
I whispered into her ear. "Won't they girl? "Her answer was a purr

I'm thinking of joining the red cross
That's good...gets you out and about....
In the ...nei..bor....
"Okay .. Whats yet to be told ...spill
"They asked me to run the admin office" She
So you'll have to travel for a while  that's ok" (He)
"The whole admin office for foreign.... "  She let it trail......
Allright so you come back weekends
Ain't that far....to... (He)
      .......... ...Japan ....(She)
Dad........didn't  have any words to say
And the staunch started peeling away...right then and there
The love they shared
Might be compared
To historic qualities
Romeo and Juliet  sans tragedy
Bogie and Bacall  for longevity
Tracy and Hepburn for loyalty
Burns and Allen for ..for the comedy
So I knew.. as..  anyone else who  
Saw him day to day decline
That she was on her way home
By seeing the force of nature
He suddenly became
A human dynamo in preparation
For the reunification.

I walked through the front door
Sharon at my side and lacey in tow
"Go tell your brother to get in here "
So she yelled out the front door
"Trenton Dean Robertson get in here!"
Sharon and I met eye to eye
Bossiest little Seven year old....
"TRENTON now!"  I  yelled  out
"You better do what sis said"
He was now ten and tended to wander about
"I'm here "he said as he appeared
"Come on sis I'll beat you in...."
The last bit muffled
As they closed the basement door
And descending down the stairs

We both glanced into the closet
For that's what it really was
Dad sitting at the computer
And mom was on the screen
So I toted my load of groceries
As Sharon leaned in to say" hi "
And once we had supper going
I went to mix a drink and as I passed by
Dad said "son come here
Your mom wants to talk to you "
Besides we've been chatting  forever!
Then he whispered "I gotta go to the loo"
"Hi mom "I said as he departed
Leaving me to warm the seat
I'm not talking to your crotch
She said for at least the millionth time
There on the screen was the face
Of someone that I loved
Who never made it home that year
The flight was destined for history
Crashing into the Himalayas
Taking everyone on board
And the staunch became so rigid
And reality was simply ignored
He handed me a coke and opened his beer
Before resuming his vigil at the computer screen
That was his reality....his fantasy... and his hex
Some might say an old adage to sum it up
"IS IT LIVE.....OR IS IT MEMOREX?"

AS I drifted from the room they were merged.







..
bennu Feb 2021
Too lame for you
You will bubble across my cortex until it expires
My pretty hell--
I fall away from the universe
In the shape of your body
bennu Aug 2020
there is something so eloquent about
you,
there is something so wrong about being
blessed
something so right about being
me

and i think a large part of that is actually you,
with your
lessons
and
good vibes
and
sweet exercise.

it's just true.
bennu Jul 2020
my twisted little heart has grown to hate romance
inject it with liquor
and it'll grow a little more

rose petals lose themselves on the wind
only destined to be a passing look

some get caught on fences
and some get caught
in my mind

but none of them taste good for very long
i'm always tearing out pieces of myself and watching them decay
you're always watching me do that
and it's never comfortable, no
no just go away

don't watch me do this
Julian Delia Jul 2019
Ġrieħi miftuħin,
Xejn ma jrid jingħalaq.
Suppost, il-ġnus maqgħuda,
Iżda lkoll qegħdin mifruxin,
Donnu, xejn ma jrid jiċċaqlaq.

Feriti ifferoċjati bil-melħ,
Kruċjati, bla ebda sens ta’ ferħ.
U l-imħabba għal proxxmu -
Dik x’sar minnha?
Issa sibna x-xoqqa f’moxta;
Ħlifna, bit-tarf ta’ din il-pinna,
Naslu għal verità, naraw x’insarrfu minnha.

Allura, x’inhi din il-verità?
Qiegħed nassumi li hekk qegħdin tistaqsu.
M’hemmx dibattitu, ir-realtà turik,
Kollox f’ħinu, kollox f’waqtu.
Ir-risposta tiegħi hija din;
Tlifna kull sens ta’ valur,
Tlifna kull sens ta’ twemmin.

M’għadniex nemmu fil-valur tal-ħajja ta’ kullħadd.
M’għadniex nemmnu li kull azzjoni għanda impatt.
Nemmu li aħna progressivi, u Ewropej;
Jekk vera nemmnu hekk,
Lesti nħallsu għall-eċċessi u d-dejn?
Mhux dejn fiskali, iżda dejn immortali,
Id-dejn tad-demm li xxerred,
Dejn is-sudditti, dejn l-iskjavi.

In fatti, is-superjorità materjali ġejja minn hekk;
Mill-gwerer tas-slaten, u l-gideb ta’ dawn tal-ġlekk.
Daħħalna xafra disa’ pulzieri ‘il ġewwa,
Biex imbagħad ħriġniha sitta ‘il barra;
Ta’ parsi għandna l-ugwaljanza,
Għax issa jsawtuk xorta, iżda b’aktar ħlewwa.

Qabel, kellna l-ktajjen u l-forza brutali.
Issa, għandna l-kuntratti, u l-kodiċi penali,
Bil-banek jirrenjaw,
Bil-gvernijiet korporazzjonijiet statali.
Mhux ha nitlobkom temmnuni -
Nitlobkom biss teżaminaw il-fatti.
M’għandix spag x’jiġbduli;
Il-kuxjenza nadifa,
U m’għandix gideb x’ngħatti.

_______

’Open wounds’

Open wounds;
They aren’t closing.
Nations should be united,
But we are far apart,
Seems like nothing wants to budge.

Wounds, seasoned with salt,
Crucibles, with no sense of joy.
And, about that love for one’s fellow man -
What happened to that?
Now, we’ve found the perfect moment;
We’ve sworn, with the tip of this pen,
(that) We’ll get to the truth,
See what we can make of it.

So; what is the truth?
I am assuming that’s what you’re asking.
There’s no debate, reality shows you,
In due time and place, in the right moment.
My answer is this -
We’ve lost all our sense of valour,
We’ve lost all our sense of belief.

We no longer believe in the value of everyone’s life.
We no longer believe every action impacts others.
We believe that we are progressive, and European;
If we do believe that,
Are we ready to pay back our excesses and debts?
This is not fiscal debt, but rather an immortal one,
The debt of the blood that has been shed,
The debt of subjects and slaves.

In fact, material superiority stems from this;
From the wars of lords and the lies of the suits.
We’ve pushed a blade nine inches inward,
And pushed it six inches outward;
Pretending we have equality,
Just because now, they’ll still beat you, but more sweetly, more subtly.

Before, we had chains and brute force.
Now, we have contracts, and the penal code,
With banks reigning supreme,
With governments who are now state corporations.
I am not asking you to believe me -
I am asking you to examine the facts.
I have no strings, none that can be pulled;
My conscience is clean,
And I have no lies to cover up.
Dedicated to a nation full of crooks and *******.
seahund Mar 2018
Lying in this bed I (insistently) made,
I find anything but satisfaction.
(Let alone...
                                      comfort.)
Excavate­d artifacts encircle
My desolate frame,
Asking inescapable questions
Of a hard-fought,
Though fateful battle.
Haze begins to ^^clear^^.
Pigments melding to restore a
Grander painting...:
~NothingButAnswers.~
too little.
                 ...too late.


I had lost sight
Of the all the magic that was you and I.
Lost track
Of the time we ~{infused}~ with beauty.
Lost memories
Of moments that molded my mind,
My heart, my soul...
Moved                                                    ­   further
From my home             nextto                              yours.
Wondering & Wandering,
Initiating dark internal wars.
I>>lost                                  << you
in the crossfire and haze of doubt.
I lost [yourhand] within ]mine[
The moment I trifled with that
Reckless piece of weaponry.
Your face slowly disa| |ppe| |ar| |e| |d
From my sky.
Constellations forsook your name.
Nevertheless,
I could only look (vv)down(vv)
At the carnage I was conducting.
Blinders obscuring my ||every option||...
[[no]thing]
but
.endings.
My world was deficient
In beauty and splendor;
Void of love, light, and words like “forever”.
And                            [.you.]
Just standing there.
Forlorn.
In the                [        ]     center [               ] of my battlefield
Between           [logic]      and    [emotion],
Palms open to the heavens,
With only questions
still gone                     unanswered.
I,
The Fool,
Not.once to look up,
Fall to my knees
And surrender my hands to your stArs.
Not.once question
Why I picked up that deadly instrument.
Not.once turn my gaze
From misguided mirage.
You were ≥right≥≥there≤≤,
All along.
Trying to make better sense of my riddles.
Trying to hold on to a listless wrist,
Whose pair was waging a worthless war.
I cry, now, (drunkwithsadness,)
For those deprived fingers,
And how they desperately looked
For a hint of life
In my callus clutches.
I cry for the night's frozen wishes,
Fervently howling for my heed.
I cry for The1One
Who stood in the eye of my storm;
Devastated,
      Obliterated,
                           Un /-_-/ [done].

These recurring reminders;
Now all that remains
Of our weathered pages(andpagesand...).
Footnotes tattooed:
Never to forget
How I couldn’t remember
The magic once sculpted
Inamomentof:
- ...forever...
bennu Jul 2020
a voice that belongs to the winds of the wilderness
strong thighs running like the Susquehanna through its cold, grey morning
she speaks from the hearth of her gut of a lust for life
dives through the waves and into the distance
never to be seen again
bennu Jul 2020
he was a pet name
of troubled origin!

maybe a little more
than just a floating face
with some business behind it.

anyway, i wonder about her dead cat
hers, not schrodinger's
and find myself once in a sea of people.

some of them are weird,
some i haven't yet met
and maybe that's what weirds me out the most
is that i'm only approximately real.

oh, for the love of god...

someone grab me a Dos Equis.
blackbiird Aug 2019
in this thing
called life
yet everyone
still tries
to make me
visible
just to
make me
d
di
dis
disa
disap
disapp
disappe
disappea
r
Sometimes Starr Mar 2023
Nothing you see is not yourself!
And your eyes pulled them up in the shape that they would

When the sting of another enters the room
A threat on your wife, or on your property

So you cannot be the stellar musician but you'd rather listen
So, always pine after what's never given

So I scream to God YOU LET THEM PRACTICE BUT NOT ME!! YOU CULTIVATED THEIR EFFORTS BUT NOT MINE!!
And Dad answers back that it's my choice...

And from the quantum foam between these two notions springs Gabriel, singing
"You are a circle, you will always be complete"

I cannot calm my frothing blood
We operate on the tension that rends and renders me
Disa bowed briefly saying
You don't read, you write

You are all my ideas
And I want the blame
I want the credit
YES HONEY I WANT EVERYTHING
THESE ARE ANGRY WORDS BUT I WANT TO BE CALM
I AM CALM RIGHT NOW
I WANT PEACE
I WANT TO BE SATIS
I WANT EVERYTHING
I LOVE YOU

nevermind I'm just gonna chill
bennu Aug 2020
a dizzy name, a silly song
an old, cracked joke
a dried bouquet.

when Marshall realized Lilly was,
in fact,
being just a little selfish,
and Ted coached the appropriate response.

moments like that.

like why did i hang for so long?

right,
but,
there's strong truth to that too,
when maybe it was just her style
her lust for life that was so hot
so exact, it was love
maybe she just stole all your breath
and never
*******
gave it back.

i don't care if you're married,
i don't care if you're open or closed
older or colder or kinder or both
i don't care if we hug
i don't care who knows
but i'll be ******
if i never see you again,

Disa.
it's creeping up on me now. that it's empty. that she was just privileged and not much special. but it HAS to be special. well, it was. i swear i'm not just ttripping... i REMEMBER her. she was SO COOL. she stunned me. she totally just stunned me with how beautiful she was, and how exactly HER. do what makes YOU happy. fight HARD for yourself and everything you love. wake up and go for runs in the morning. have **** pictures of yourself in your room. trace your lovers' hands by your bedside for your new boyfriend to see. you made me want to explore what it means to be human. it's an honest swoon. yeah there was some **** you coulda done better but second time around i wouldn't even ask for that, i'd get you addicted and just hang around you all day.

i have met no one like you~
I've had the power to make you squirm and writhe
As it turns out, I'm just a shriveled worm
But no!
You can't have that
Our secret's deep, and strong
I know

You know I'm thirty and I pick my nose

Well tissues aren't always close by
And these digits are just so...
Oh well, ******* you!
I wash my ****** hands!

And then it dawned on me...
You don't care.
You just don't care.

But then I took it too far.

Because not only did I pick my nose, I...
Well, nevermind.

We don't have to talk about that,
Because I did what I'm supposed to do.
And you know I'm a gentleman,
And I shaped up,
And I managed myself how a gentleman should.

Anyway, I have things to attend to.

Trees to identify,
Spanish to learn, you see.

And no, this is not all some big joke to me.

I just think it's all too much,
And I'm pleased to know you feel the same way,

Disa Turner.

Oh, don't,
Well if you must
I oblige you
Take my soul, there
Ah, just, go
Do it!
Jeremy, you *******...!

— The End —