We sit across the room from each other
I catch your sideways glances
Like butterflies floating in and out
amongst rose bushes
Just a flutter in my line of sight
That you believe goes unnoticed

You tell me that you have someone else
That we can’t be doing this
But no is something
I’m used to jumping over
Because if I’m being honest,
Her castle walls around your heart
Feel more like picket fences

I’m not saying that this could be love
I’m just thinking that the curve of your shoulder must taste like black licorice
You might not be the water I need
But you are the hot cup of coffee
that I drink to give me a little extra energy
You can keep telling me no
All the way into my black satin sheets
but you won’t win this battle
Because I know that you know
That no isn’t in my vocabulary

You can say and do
Whatever you think
Would make you feel better
About your self and your circumstances
But you will not stop my light from shining

I am a star
That shines bright on many horizons
Across the universe
Bringing light and life
to the depths of oceans
And climbing to the tops of mountains

This body cannot contain
The expanse of my radiance
I can glow warm
with the orange flames of
A hundred candlelabras
I can kiss the darkness
Of the night sky
and shimmer into worlds that go unseen
With out my touch

I am an angel of light created
In the image of the One of Universal Light
The daughter of a king
Healer of shadows
So forgive me
For not playing frivolous games
with you
When I have
A whole world
That needs the light
inside of me
That you try so hard to dim

I wish you would just meet me in the middle
I wish there was a world that existed
Where lines were never crossed
and there was no border patrol
Around the things we really want to say
I’m tired of going to war with you
I just want to find a home
In this no man’s land
And that “compromise”
Was a word that could flow easily
Off of our tongues
I know you miss me
You know that I miss you
But somehow our messages
Have been lost in transmission
I live in clouds
Floating in freeform shapes into different worlds
While you plant roots deep
In the soil
Of who you think you’ll always be
But I’ve never heard of clouds
Moving forests
Or
Trees that can kiss the sky
So how can we find a middle ground
When there is so much space between us

I think you enjoyed the show
The tears rolling down my face
Came through to you in high definition
Did the sound of my voice over sullen music
Make you feel inspired?
Or did you change the channel on me?
Did you put me on mute in the middle of my monologue?
Or did you hang on every word?
I don’t think you realize that
The events you think are televised
Aren’t paid actors
There is no encore
No Hollywood dreams come true
After this story is told
And you put on quite a show yourself
Making me believe
You really loved me
You may think that this is an Oscar winning performance
But all this was
Was just another reality show

You are the shadow
that follows me where ever I go
You are the cuffs
That criss cross my wrists
To bedposts
In Egyptian cotton sheets
With a blindfold covering my eyes
I’ll never know whether
Your breath on my neck
Will follow with a kiss
Or with hands clenched
Around my throat
I know I’ll never be able to touch you
But you still manage to get me
Back into this bed
I don’t know why you want me
As much as you do
I don’t know why I can’t see my life
With out you in it
Some days you feel like
A crazy roommate
That I don’t want to live with anymore
But don’t have the money
To break the lease
I remember the first day we met
You smiled at me
And told me your name was fear
I had never heard a name like yours before
Maybe that’s why you consume my mind
I wish I had the strength to tell you no
Your seduction is my sickness
And I just can’t seem to let you go

I don’t think you realize
How beautiful
You really are
You just don’t see yourself
from the inside out
The way that I do
you don’t know
That you glide through life
Like a school of marlins
safely from a rocky shores at sunset
That when happiness
You feel like sips of lemonade on a park bench with blue jays chirping from the branches above us
You are so comfortable in where you are
At all times
like cool denim jeans and hands held with sticky fingers from left over cotton candy
on a fall festival Ferris wheel
That when your heart is broken
the turquoise waves of your tears
Flood the hearts of many
Devastating all that
Stand just a little too close to the the force
of your tides
Don’t forget these days
Young one
You know that days like these are few and far between
So look in the mirror
And start seeing you
In all your glory
And maybe
Bit by bit
and day by day
You can start to see what I see