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She’s each soul of those
who slip on dark rooftops at night
Every brick of every tenement
wearing her bullet wounds like rings
on her slender pale fingers.
She has long blonde hair
golden grain alike
Always dyed dark, hidden under thy hood.
That’s how she goes
unnoticed
forever bruised
*****, beaten and hurt.
She lurks in stone archways
weeping, screaming into the night
She hasn’t slept in ages
yet she feels so restful
facing cool dank pavement.
She would kiss every sculpture in Saxon Garden
Paskuda – she calls one of them, signed so proundly – Historia
She would try to drown herself
in cold waters of her beloved river
Which saved her so many times before
that it wouldn’t even be capable
of doing anything but loving her
and her beautiful blue eyes
and the way she chokes on her memories
every single night
walking down old stone stairs
of her forsaken streets.
Non sum quails eram
says her ****** tattoo
inked with blood of her dear children
and cherished lovers.
And every other day she’d try to destroy herself
she’d rot
she’d burn
she’d cry
Because she’s reckless
yet so sophisticated
So beautiful
and so wasted.
Tangled sheets veneer past night
Wine smudges cover my dear walls
You are not here anymore;
Once again
You are conscious
Another flow of memories
Is bursting through your veins
Like painful ache of piercing knives
Awful flawlessness, overflowing perfection
Corrupting your bloodstream with agony;
Why is there blood on your hands?
Blood-soaked sleeves of your sweater
Blazing on your pale skin with crimson glow
Like redempted lovers in a land
Where death has already conquered
I cannot hear your breath
Restful beating of your heart freezes
Yet I will sheed no tears over your frigid body
My wretched ***** lover
You loathsome empty egoist
Who left me here on my own
I will not mourn your death
For it killed who I was
Or ever will be
We collide;
Like haze of cigarettes smoke
we give away to this unloving world
every morning, unspoken.

— The End —