I’m sad
I don’t want to, but I can’t help it.
The year just started but I’m sad already
I don’t want to be sad
I love happiness, but I’m sad

I wonder what it feels like to love and be loved in return.
I’ve never experienced love
not the kind of love that runs deep.
I’ve had a number of crushes, but none have fallen that hard for me.
It makes me wonder
am I good enough to be loved ?

They said I’m vulnerable,
That I always apologize.
Even when I’m wronged,
I apologize.

I know I’m vulnerable,
And people use me a lot.
They think I’m not aware,
They handle fragile hearts like glass, cracking them without care.
Because they are weak and easy to put aside.

People know I’m vulnerable,
But I will never let them use me again.
I will stand up for myself,
Say no to things I don’t want,
And caution anyone who tries to mess with me.
I won’t do anything I don’t like for anyone,
I won’t displease myself to please anyone.

Because I’m vulnerable, not stupid.

In English, we say,
“Can I be a child again?”

But in poetry, we say,
“Take me back to when
I didn’t have to think about tomorrow before sleeping,
To when I could smile without reasons,
To when failure wasn’t a thought,
And to when I acted freely,
Without hesitation or fear.”