If this is how I lose you
Do it quickly, please
I cannot bear the soft silence
Let me ache in peace

If this is how I lose you
Be cruel and unkind
For any pity that you show
Adds years to my demise

If this is how I lose you
I must say goodbye
To you and to the part of me
That loved for the first time

If this is how I lose you
My anger will come
As soon as the fire of grief
Has frozen me numb.

I don’t like who I am anymore.
She said it best, she asked me

“What’s wrong with you? You know that this isn’t normal?”

And she’s right. Maybe she’s always been right.

It’s as if someone has harshly pulled back the curtains on a particularly sunny day, I see everything, and nothing has terrified me more.


The knowledge, that I try skirting around for the moment I touch it, it becomes my truth

And what a dark, dark truth to have.

I have an answer to most people’s questions but my own baffle me.

I baffle me

And I’m lost

And God knows I don’t have the fight in me to find myself,
So I’ll exist as though a shadow

I guess sometimes we come to the saddest realisation

Nothing lasts

Imperative movements aid the predator's success
It is a Race of Arms
Just as Gods own intent,

Eventually, I'll leave this world in peace I concur
And I will lay in snakeskin
Whilst adorned with fur.

We were fooled by an extrovert's own impropriety
You may call it a lost cause
I call it society.

…

You may call it fantasy
Yet I shamed it with piety

I want so many things
Yet those things are unknown

“Simply, I am not the woman I’d convinced myself I was.
And,
I live in fear
That my core is the very essence of what I despise in others”

Have a go and breathe
Exist with ease
See the clouds don’t fight
They feel
They bleed

What a test the verse may provide
I step my toes into the demise
And I am left with nothing but ache
And a taste for compromise
And God forbid the arise
Of that day you turn to me, sigh,
The day those cacao eyes may cry
And avoid the sight of mine

God, I know for what I ask is
Repetitive
It tires me yet again,
Sedative
But I ask for this man for life
To adore and
To call him mine

My tongue fails me in painting you the love that spills out of my heart
So take solace in my eyes and from their gaze never depart

The saddest thing is missing home, when you didn’t even have one

I’d reside in my friends smiles, now nothing, they’re gone.

A particularly partial postponement of grieves,
Lie then spit grace at my tongue with ease

Unfollowed by saviours
Unprocessed, unclean

Cartwheel by powders
Puffed and pristine

A weakness with tweaks
And the mind of a freak
I fear if she was loved
She'd turn the other cheek
So on Christ's behalf, I speak
I live vicariously
And will walk on cracked soil
As water hurts my feet

Ride the melody
With an oak wood lip
I just long for a taste
Of your marinated kiss

A lick of the earth
Can't satisfy my needs
But a touch of the ether
the beyond, the unreached.

Pardon my haste,
May I once again lie?
Joke, as your tongue envelops in mine?
We dine in silence
Unbroken with time
I'll love you in full
Until half past nine

Love unknown
To the strongest of hearts
He told me “ I love you”
Then death did us part

No longer in body
But mind inspirited
I’ve lived long enough
To dine with the privileged

If I was to know
What would become of me now
I would leave no trace,
No utter of a vow
No sight of these eyes
Would be left in the world
But return untouched,
Pure, like a pearl

With a villainous gasp I heave
Move to the sun as I bleed
Dance as time seeps through cracks
And onto this rhyme I seethe
And onto this page I grieve
Words decease as soon as they’re written
So everything here, I leave.

Is she a fool?
To leave it all behind and be at peace on her own?
But will it be tranquil or will it be hell?
Tell me what to do I'm confused,
Unwell
But am I sick because of love?
Or the thought of it's smell

Drained but replaced, with pity and Lore
Red eyes roll back
Cerise to the core,
Cherry Lips tickled,
A flavorsome bunch
But
Lost to the man in the tomb with a hunch
The eyes of a fox and tail in a bunch
And the anaemic souls he'd stole
for his lunch

A lot of it scares me.
Not much the wrinkles or the grey.
But the anticipation, the knowing,
I will one day fade away.

Be but a sad name to whisper
A lost statistic, cold.
But in my poems I'm immortal
So onto these words
I hold.

If she left it aflame,
Would he stick by?

                                                   or sigh,
                                                       as he is tossed, cast away to the
                                                            side

With just the scent of her hair,
Memory of her eyes
          
                          
                                                      With a backhand embrace
                                                             confronted with lies

"A jar of honey has never hurt anyone"




                                                         …                                                  




                                                                          Tell that to the guy who's
                                                                      manhood got stuck in one.

A young blonde, who's face more evident than her heart  
She'd cerulean eyes and the lips of a ****
A beauty for the senses, honey and innocence faded
Leaving her rotting at the core, a ****** up sadist

She was loved yet never returned the feelings to the ******
Stare you dead in the eyes and your nightmare was planned
Pitied all her life, mother wanted circumcision
So she upped and left with her ******* tilted toward fiction

Spent her days in a wine cellar, the dungeons were full
Her claws scraped at the walls bathed in grape juice that was mulled,
She'd lay on the floor, compared herself to Siddhartha
Lacerate a bit of skin every hour as a sacrifice to her father

Met the love of her life whilst dancing like a *****,
The sluttiest of the bunch, he yearned for an encore
Mother begged and refused, sensed the evil in her eyes,
She was bought around whilst she was wedged between her thighs.