I sit here and think without a blink

you fill my memories old

my stale tears, stained to grey

the once beautiful now in decay


Our garden in ruins

our bright red roses

petals dry

f

a

l

l

e

n


We have stopped the rain

my emerald green weep

another day

a darker shade of grey

Layers of me, all

around your body

our legs entwined

my breath in your neck


Stroke through me hair

Pull me closer,


Butterfly kisses

Strawberry whispers

and bourbon promises

all through the night


Morning coffee

wearing only your T-shirt

and freshly

squeezed juice

These are the moments I treasure,

whether you remember them

or not


These are my precious moments

When you loved me

before the complications of the day

took over what our hearts

and souls needed

I woke up this morning

with the sun in my view

birds singing a happy greeting

flowers smiling as I tickle their petals with drizzly drops


But my heart is heavy

my tears are flowing

another day

colorful accessories covering my grey memories of you


Driving, as I do every morning

coffee at the office and the usual

small talk

back in my space, alone behind a closed door to the world outside,


allowing my emotions to flow

onto this page

it is the only way

I would cope through this day, my tears frozen, for now

Your stone-cold heart

does not match mine

not like it used to

we are worlds apart now


I made you smile

I made you dance

I made you look forward to the rain

Oh, how we soaked in love


After all, that's said and done

and then some

an emptiness many can see in me

but never really feel

It's been a long time

since we connected

beautiful words, shared

you are my friend



You don't utter unkind

you push me

to a better version of me

your respect for me, I treasure



A man, not mine

but you are in my heart

my soul searched

and found you, my Yusuf, my friend.

I see you through
a reflection I only wish
you could enjoy, raw and beautiful
but this is my view, for now

At first glance, I dare not ask to dance!
Intimidating...
Breaking down your high walls
has been a task, a frustrating challenge

You speak few words,
your time
I have to demand
but demand,  I will

For the man I see, the gentleman in you,
is worth my effort
surely one day, for you to demand
... more time with me

Your gaze will not penetrate
my steel frame, easily
my rusted heart
and olden thoughts
only know cold frozen emotion

My nights are spent with
memories, barely remembered
snippets of forgotten love
and betrayal  

My soul remains a muted
flickering light
of a little hope
and perhaps, love

I still hope
that one day,
love will unlatch
my rusted heart