after you left
I became so afraid
so very afraid
everything became lifeless
so very lifeless
because I had built my life around you
I guess that's where I went wrong
so very wrong

He's afraid of rejection
so he doesn't try
He's afraid of the bullies
so he doesn't cry
He's afraid of isolation
so when they ask, he lies
He's afraid of his teachers
afraid they will pry
He's afraid of his family
of the if's and why's
He's so afraid
of what they might think
that he's forgot
to live his life

Your silent screams for help,
just whispering pleads
are so deafening

you're happy
so I'll pretend I am
I'll fake a smile, wear my mask
forget the current, build a dam

I don't think you notice
I don't think you care
the ache I go through
stays hidden
this can't be fair

well I decided to be independent
decided to forget about you
and all that we had, or rather, didn't have
I deleted all of our messages
threw away all of our notes
that were yellowed and aged
just like our love
I deleted your number
with a surge of fierce determination
but how do I erase
all these scars you left behind?

I remember the time we nearly held hands
such a fleeting, beautiful, timeless moment
but then reality struck
and we went back to "just friends" plan

my little brother just suggested that hugs were
Band-aids for the soul
and I guess he more wise than most people

Oh, dear
I've been pierced
with the knife of love
Oh, dear
and I think
fatally

that star above me
shining bright in the midnight sky
maybe, just maybe
you're looking at it tonight

and you're thinking of me
and how I love the stars
maybe, just maybe
you'll wish I were there

that star above me
might lead you to me
and restore
all that was lost
maybe, just maybe

all those maybies
but sometime I'll face reality
as I look at that star
and know

you're probably at home
playing Xbox with your friends
and I'm the farthest thing
from your mind

She heard her little mockingbird
Majestic fantasy
Through all the rhyme and reasons
For such fake security

We heard the call, she heard it too
Time stood so still
But the world just kept on turning
With no seconds left to ****

And when the summer turned to fall
And promises broke from the chill
She ignored her little mockingbird
And it's cry from heaven's hill

You called me today
And said you had broke up with her
You asked me if I'd changed much
Yes I have
I'm not the weak girl you left
I'm not as trusting as I once was
Not as happy as I could be
I don't wish upon stars anymore
don't throw pennies in a well
You hurt me
Dear God you hurt me
And yet it was for the good
Because I don't need you anymore
And I'm more careful around wildflowers
So, yes dear, I've changed
And I'm the one hanging up this time

Dear God,
I know I don't pray
nearly as much as I used to
but now I am
You've blessed me, God
with him
Thank you

Remember that day
we were watching Roman Holiday
and you reached over and kissed my cheek
Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck as my witness
that was a timeless, eternal second
and though we were only twelve
and we both went our separate ways
I'll always remember you
my beautiful Roman Holiday

We all love the snow,
play in it,
enjoy it,
until it starts to melt,
and we're done with it
Isn't that how we treat people as well?

What will happen when I die?
Will random people stop and cry?

I wonder what my friends will say
On my glorious parting day

Will I get flowers, and a stone with my name,
And put in a field of gray flowers
That all look the same?

Will they say I made an impact
before death came to take me back?

Will they day I did my part,
with my pen and page, and dusty heart?

I hope when I die, I'm satisfied
And with my last breath can say I tried

When my body meets the dark patient ground,
I hope I sleep eternally, safe and sound

I know you're not as happy as you seem
I know there's tears hidden behind your glass brown eyes
But I know how strong you are
and maybe this will make you a little stronger.
You don't know the impact you make
I'm the farthest thing from a happy person
but since you tiptoed into my life,
I cry a little less,
and live a little more
you're worth so much more than you realize
Thank You

Dear you
I loved you so much
maybe a little too much
and if you want the truth
I still do
It hurts to see you happy
hurts to know that
you don't miss me the way I miss you
I just want you to know
that I'm always here
waiting for you
And no matter what you do
no matter what you get into
no matter where you go
or what you say
I still love you
And I guess I always will

and I thought you said you loved me....

unless you hold the key to happiness,
which no on ever does
your life is just a collection of
dried up tears,
wasted time,
useless dreams,
unsent letters,
words left unsaid,
feelings unfelt,
and
bad decisions

the flowers grows
slowly sprouting forth from it's roots
trying so hard to make a statement

but it just gets ignored
trampled on, through the storm
slowly losing it's determination

but the sun must rise, life must go on
with or without you
the world must keep turning

so grow, little flower
branch as you go
because no one's gonna wait for you to catch up

You say you understand but you do not
I see the sympathy across your face
I just wish you saw me for who I am
Saw me as more than a charity case
Stop trying to imagine what it's like
Maybe there is a God, maybe there's not
If there is, he's got a sense of humor
I mean, just look at my pitiful life
Accidental and wrong in every way
I wish he'd find better entertainment
No one understands, no one ever will
Maybe they'll hear and believe the rumors
Of why I killed myself that lonely night
They say it wasn't bullying or love
But it was just over life in itself
They say she warned her friends a million times
They just couldn't comprehend the signs
They say she doesn't blame all her friends
Just some can live life, others have to leave
Maybe in some other life, you'll see me happy

If you do not care
If you think love is a lie
I'll think like that too

I'm sorry
I didn't realize
That my sadness
Rubbed off on you
I didn't realize
That I've been dragging you down
So I'm trying
To hide my sadness
And form a smile just for you

you say life is so exhilarating
and liberating
but oh, my dear
so is death

I can't calm your fears
I can't drive away your demons
I can't rest your soul
that's been so weary all these years

I can't dry your tears
I can't be your savior
I can't mend your heart
that's even more broken than it appears

So I'll just hold you
as you cry the pain away
and love you
and hopefully pull you through

A worried sky
A clouded dawn
The sky's tears laid upon the earth

such sweet liberty
such chained ectasy
don't miss the sun's morning birth

time flies
at an aching speed
but life isn't all
what we perceive

When I was a little child
And I'd fall and cut myself
I'd run to my mother
Surely surely
She could help
Her eyes met mine
As she wiped away my tears
And kissed the pain away            years have passed since those days
And now life has left me with these cuts on my soul
And my mother isn't there to kiss them away

I didn't quit trying to be the person you wanted me to be
I quit trying altogether
I'll just fade slowly away
Until I'm nothing but a memory
Or a figment of your imagaination