awakening
i'm holding onto nothing
the harsh reality hits
that my arms
    are empty
how could something
that felt so good
in my dream
become a nightmare
when i awake?

I'm sitting under a crying tree
Praying no tears fall upon me
I can not believe what I can not see
So sing your tragic song

The horns blast in every field
The moon falls while mad men kneel
The cloaked ones who in fear ****
Will all cry and sing along

Call it glory
Call it misery
Call it faith
Call it empathy

Call it truth
But you know it's just a lie

Call it love
Fight the hate
Hide your tears
Behind the pain

Call it life
But you know it's just a lie

When you woke me up
The first thing I saw were stars
Only they weren't stars;
They were your eyes.
They were so captivating that I found myself lost and swore I saw the entire universe.
When you woke me up
I saw your smile
But I thought it was the sun
For it shined so bright that I had to squint and as its radiance slowly stretched outward towards my skin I felt comfort in it.
When you work me up
I saw your scars and they were beautiful to me. They showed me your pain and I kissed everyone so you knew that regardless of what others may have seen I saw them as a perfect part of you.
These scars molded who you were and who you are and in that I find beauty.
When you woke me up
You woke up more than just my body; you woke up my soul.

I want something that I cannot have. I cannot have it because I don't truly know what it is. I've seen it polished and propped as if it were on display and I've heard the stories of how much time and effort it took to make it look as such. But I want it. I want love. I want the idea of it at least.
I want the fights brought about by events simpler and less important than the time we wasted to have them. I want to be pained by the sight of her pain and know that the feeling of knives piercing my chest when I see her cry is there because I would literally drive them there myself, if only to prevent her tears.
I want our laughs to intertwine over the smallest things and our conversations to stretch our minds over the biggest. I want to see you sleep at night and I'll smile because I know that you're finally at peace. And I want you to smile when you wake up because you know that I'm fighting to make your reality better than your dreams.
I want love. I want romantic love, I want crazy love. I want passion. I want to pick you up in my arms and in that brief present get lost in your presence. I want to be in you when I am in you and have you wish that I would stay forever. I want to be in your heart and mind, and I want our love to be torturous and blind.
I just want love. I want the idea of it at least.