It means not putting her down when she hurts you
It means listening to her words rather than hearing her voice
It means telling her she's hot when she thinks she's not
It means holding her when she cries, and letting her hold you when you cry
It means accepting you're not perfect but still doing your best
It means doing the right thing when it's not easy
It means having endurance on the days you want to quit
It means learning to be a good husband and father
It means hugging her when she's doing the dishes, telling her to rest on the couch, and doing them yourself
It means putting your family first no matter what
It means loving her through your actions not your words

That's the man I want to be.

I will make you watch the fire you started destroy everything I hold dear. And then I will make you look me in the eyes and see what you truly destroyed.

Eyes are the window to the soul
And you just broke this soul
So now I'm going to bury you
Six feet under!

I'm not giving up
I'm not giving in
I'm not letting go
I'm not breaking!

What if I told you I have a monster within?
What if I showed you the dark side of my soul?

I have PTSD, but never been overseas
All came from some fights between mom and dad
Whenever someone yells, I still look to hide.
I've even shut down so far I could ****.

When I was 17, a ******, I got *****
Yeah, most wouldn't call it that
But she took advantage of me
Preyed on my feelings when I wasn't ready.

That unleashed a terrible monster in me
Always craving a new woman to sleep with.
I honestly don't know how many women I've been with.
After a while, they all seem the same.
Three years of unchecked debauchery and lust.

And there's some women in there I played.
Used their vulnerable heart to get what I want.
Just like I was played at 17...
How many broken hearts did I leave behind?

I'm skilled at the art of deception
And I know how to please a woman
So my addiction never stopped.
Not until recently.

I started to write, hadn't done it much before.
Didn't really think about what I was writing
But seeing myself in black and white I saw...
I needed to get better, and God gave me an answer.

I may be on my way to better days
But this needed to be told.
I'm not a good man
But I try my best to be, now.

Off to church in Sunday's best;
But why must it be formal dress?
God sees through ties and vests;
So who is it we'll impress?

Can't let our friends and family
See through our masquerade
Gotta be perfect for this day
Let nobody see every other day

Sunday: "Perfect"
Monday: Cuss out your co-worker
Tuesday: Neglect to spend time with your kids
Wednesday: Go to Bible Study
Thursday: Drink all night
Friday: Hit the *******
Saturday: Recover for tomorrow

So often I feel that church is just a costume party.

I've been on the cliff's edge a few times in my life
Staring at the sharp rocks that could claim my life.
Yes, I've wanted to jump before
To let the stones take my bones.

I could stay there for a long time, too.
Long enough for hunger to tear at my stomach
Long enough for my tongue to crack from dryness.

But I never fell off the edge.
Not because I had a revelation.
Not because I felt life needed living.
Not because I won against depression.

I simply turned around
And I started walking life again
And the days got better and worse
But I kept walking; I don't need to die.

I needed a miracle, today.
Now my friends need a miracle.
So here I am.
Asking for a miracle.

A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link.
But if all links are eroded and rusted, what happens?
You break free.