The days of my youth are being wasted

Spent with a man who will someday become
just
a

memory

nobody gives a ****
about poetry
or books
charles bukowski
or siddhartha
nobody gives a ****
about the universe
or extra terrestrials
carl sagan
or that we are stardust
nobody gives a ****
about Led Zeppelin
or Pink Floyd
Joni Mitchell
or Nirvana
nobody gives a ****
except for me

**** me to sleep shake me up and align everything back where it needs to be deal with this ***** so I can finally get some rest I need sleep not that I don't get my rest every single night but it's still not enough I don't wanna remember slowly drifting off with **** heavy on my mind to only follow me in my dreams, **** all that **** out of me and replace it with every last warm drop of you. I want everything to shut down so can finally rest take me to the top nice and slow and hold me tight as I come down **** all this energy out of me I can't sleep well when it's overflowing I don't wanna toss and  turn in the middle of the night **** me so hard that, that's impossible! Make me numb. No I don't want to wake up to *** no I don't want a **** glass of water at 3 am no I don't ******* need to check my phone for the time...that's unnecessary! I need sleep a deep sleep wear me out baby    
exhaust my soul..I'll wake up feeling so energized revived and alive...can you give me the sleep I need?

The amount of time and love I spent on you
Has surley been wasted
And it angers me so
I could have used that love more wisely
Maybe on myself

How pathetic is it
That everytime I hear the roaring
Of a diesel engine
I turn around to glance
Secretly hoping it may be you
But you sold your truck,
And you no longer come out
To this part of town.

How pathetic is it that everytime a sad song
Creeps up on me
On the radio
My heart begins to pound
And the sound of your voice
Swirls around in my brain
Like a never ending vortex
And I'm reminded
Of everything you once said
The song may be over,
But I still remember it word from word
And I always seem to find it
Still stuck in my head

How pathetic is it
That still to this day
You're the only soul that's ever gotten
To me
So deep you pierced my heart
Your mark is within me forever
And it never will heal
The scar will forever be noticable


How pathetic is it
That when I lay down at night
I replay the whole past in my head
I remember every word
Every detail
And the exact way you said my name
And If you said my name
One last time
I then could die a happy girl

How pathetic is it
That you control my every day
Yet I have not seen you in almost a year
And you are always there waiting for
Me
In my dreams
I just can't seem to escape from you
And once I awake
I'm left feeling as if a hole was punched
Through my chest
I feel so empty

Maybe tonight I'll be able to
Get you off my mind for a little
When my blood is flooded with alcohol
Even then,
You cross my mind and I feel
Myself wallowing in my own sorrow
Dreaming of the future we could have had
And wondering where it all went wrong


Its beyond pathetic knowing
I'll never get over you
Even though you're over me
And long gone
Never to return to this part of town

I'm pathetic and I'll admit it
Only because maybe you'll see
I need you
And come back and save me