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27.3k · Oct 2019
red lipstick
eli Oct 2019
today,
i wore it again
and people complimented me
they say red is my color
and it suits me.

today,
it's too thick and dark
did i overapply
no, it's the right amount
just enough
to make them think
i'm fine.

today,
i look at myself
in the mirror,
and they're right
red shines on me,
so i applied
another layer,
and another
until my lips felt too thick,
but my eyes still see
the scars beneath it.
3.4k · Feb 2019
not for sale
eli Feb 2019
gracing the streets,
with her pink stilleto
and a pricy frappuccino—
she barely sips
they can't take their eyes off her,
well, who would?
even i,
i can't.

she has class and elegance,
money, power—
what else is missing?
oh, i know,
the reason i stared at her for a minute.
i just can't forget,
how unbothered she is
when she threw the empty cup
on the ground.
i wonder why
she doesn't use her bills
to buy some manners?
oh wait—
i forgot--
that's not for sale.
963 · Oct 2019
don't forget
eli Oct 2019
don't forget
to breathe,
when all is
too much
that it suffocates
you.

don't forget
to breathe,
when life
wrings your neck,
making you lose
your sanity.

don't forget
to breathe,
even if
it's harder
than not breathing
at all.

don't forget
to breathe,
don't wait
for the time
when you can no longer
save yourself
from drowning.
362 · Aug 2020
flawed
eli Aug 2020
i don't even know
if i'm truly healed
or i'm just distracted
with a new set of scars

tho i realized
they are not just flaws
they are pieces of me
for without them
i will never be
the same person
i am today  
for without flaws
i may look perfect
but i will have
no substance
i am on my way to fully embracing my flaws.
269 · Sep 2020
too young
eli Sep 2020
she prefers to stay
at home—cuddle until
we fall asleep,
she likes to braid
her hair, soft
fingertips creating art,
she loves to smell
my shirt—hugs me
from the back, while
her arms linger
around my waist,
and she smiles everytime
our fingers lock
together.

she was so beautiful—
it hurts,
she was a rare gem—
it kills me,
she was everything i needed—
but i was too young
too dumb,
i failed to make her stay.
251 · Aug 2020
don't tell her
eli Aug 2020
don't tell her
how to dress,
she has her own
mind and will,
it could be a shorts,
pants or plain shirt,
her choice if she wants
it sleeveless or
with sleeves
covered or not
with lace or ribbons.

don't tell her
how to dress,
it's not her fault
if there are *******
out there
wanting to
devour women
against their will,
it's not her fault
if her dress is too short
she didn't wear it
to be the object
of attention
nor to be touched
without consent,
she dresses to express
her own identity
so don't ever tell her
how to dress.
195 · Feb 2019
water
eli Feb 2019
it started raining
i didn't even notice
thought it was just my tear ducts
being too productive.
155 · Sep 2020
slap of truth
eli Sep 2020
kind words
make you feel
soft, for a minute—
loved and sheltered.

harsh words
slash like
a butcher knife,
pierce through your
heart, and stay
on your mind for days,
weeks or even years.

but at some point
in our lives,
kind words protect
you from the truth
while harsh words
expose you—
forcing you to wake up
and see that the world
isn't black and white,
it won't always spin
around you,
it will render you
helpless, hopeless—
but sometimes,
a slap teaches better
than a warm hug.
148 · Sep 2020
not ashamed
eli Sep 2020
different,
are you...really?
how about
all others
are too busy
being a duplicate
of another—
making each
one of them
the same
almost identical
while there you are
at the farthest
area of the room,
exerting no effort
at being yourself.
143 · Sep 2020
autumn's fall
eli Sep 2020
stained
by the passing season
it fell down helplessly,
the branches
it once hold onto
denied it
without remorse—
as if the months
they've been together
didn't matter
didn't happen.

wind gushed
as it reached
the end of line
whispering
'your time is up'
'you should rest now',
and as the new
born leaves
began to sprout
and grow,
it lies on the ground—
stepped on,
forgotten.
136 · Aug 2020
compass
eli Aug 2020
i always end up opening
the wrong door
following a temporary light
chasing the wild goose
and getting lost,
now here i am in the woods
with my wavering hope,
i'm still lost
i don't know where to go
tpredators around me
and i am just a prey
wanting to find home,
tell me which direction
i should take
'cause i'm done
deciding for myself
for i always ****** up,
i just want to know
which way to go
i just want to arrive
on my destination,
i need a compass
or i'll be eaten alive
any minute now
131 · Aug 2020
gleaming
eli Aug 2020
a diamond
in the sky,
twinkling nonstop
looking so expensive
envied by the lowly.

but every night,
she sheds a tear
'cause it pays a price
to be on top,
it's lonely up there.

— The End —