This just...in...
     Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
     Highland Manor mission control...
     I reed you soft and vague...,
     why...lace hymn ha shoes,
bless ma hush puppies tongue,
     and save my unglued soul
lettuce be hoed - heal thee

     bountiful cobbler skills,
     and declare today
     a salad day holiday,
     yea..and please ex queues
me, but how boot we
     even invite a troll,
     the nastiest, meanest,
     and leanest, and moost a muse

zing, (plus all three Bill
     Goats Gruff - no kidding)
     in order to celebrate
     Matthew Scott Harris,
     cuz he accomplished,
     an ear raking impossible goal
only unscathed
     with moderate injury

     limited to both Achilles heal,
     whereas his little duffed feet...
     suffered toe till
     black deckered bruise
according to emergency
     medic Doctor Scholl
oh...no...,..."crackling noise,"
     the on call ambulance

     just gave me more
     devastating clues
he broke down in tears,
     and **** in con soul
able, no matter he scored
     a victorious dues,
where matthew didst payless
     than three dollars

     at Liberty Thrift store
     snagging snug as
     a bug in a rug,
     and perfect fit
     ting akin to gloved hand
just like brand "new"
     slightly pre worn sneakers
     (big toenail graces

     foremost edge),
yet the sorrowful downside
     left size nine hole
in his heart, cuz final respect
     paid during vespers service
and after open casket views
in somber regard to

     battered, critically most
     raggedy in the whole
world wide web,
     those knockabout "sneaks"
tattered e'en nosed turned up,
     sans Snoop doggy dog chews.