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INSAMITY  Feb 2011
Daily Torture
INSAMITY Feb 2011
Heart frozen,
Mind broken,
Soul stolen,
Agony in the open,
A life suffering for others.

Unbearable fear,
Scared every day,
Scared every month,
Every year,
Scared every second of my worthless existence,
Scared for other peoples wellbeing,
Scared of losing those that I hold dear,
Scared of being left alone for the rest of my years,
Sat in my cell of darkness,
Drowning in my own tears.

Chained up,
Locked away,
Kept in the dark,
Self esteem torn apart,
On fire!
Burning in my prison,
Starving flames adding to this pain,
This is how I feel,
This is my daily torture,
And I am my own executioner.

My reflection provokes me,
Chokes me,
I'm ugly!
Which ******* invented the mirror?!
I might as well be dead,
What could Emz possibly see in me?
I know what I see,
And sometimes I want to gouge my own eyes out,
I'm a freak and I can't stand it!
I sentenced myself to a miserable life because I dispise myself,
Only Emily can keep me alive,
She's the only one that can breathe life into me,
She's the only one that can set me free,
Please! Please help me!!
Set me free from this prison of self loathing!
I hate it more than I hate myself.
Copywright of Sam Gregory Publishers
dj  Jan 2013
Shampoo
dj Jan 2013
(Wash, rinse, repeat)

The white dome of bone beckons
For another wash, again
Again,
BACK into the shower basin, again
4th time tonight I'm BACK

Scrubbing my scalp
Fingernails on shriveled fingertips
digging trails & rivers
Through the skinny bone.
Crop circles all over my balloon head
showing & telling White Skull Diaries

Squeezing the shampoo bottle empty
Shaky, macabre cleansing;
I get lost watching the spiral of water & bubbles
As it vanishes down a drain

I step out of the steaming shower
And face a foggy mirror, again
Again,
I dispise the blurry reflection
All I see is a stark white skull anyway

It goes back far
This is going to be hard to hide
Exposing more and more white skull
"Just stop already
The drain's f
*king clogged with hai   r"
censored curse words look cool
DC raw love  Dec 2016
Secrets
DC raw love Dec 2016
Secrets as a chlid,
are done for fun...

Yet secrets in life,
can lead one to a gun...

Secrets that one hides,
can only lead to dispise...

Secrets we hold,
as we grow old...

Secrets we feel,
cant always be healed...

Secrets between two,
of love so true...

Secrets about ***,
is always the best...

Secrets that hurt,
come from the dirt...

Yet secrets of two,
are held by me and you...
Anais Mostly May 2013
Hotel room a/c fans faded red curtains
Lamp shade mutes the generic glow
Side stepped your way into something so certain
A dance no one  means to learn
Yet,  everybody knows

Yeah, you used to want something and you lost it in your lover's eyes
Fatal to acquiesce
No you can't acquire the original wonder you gifted him the year he said good- bye

You were too young to fathom
Now the monopoly houses in the suburbs look like geriatric wards

Easy blueprints to dispise
Cheap siding to realize

You dream of nothing
Your thoughts aren't your own

I promise that I won't wait
There is nothing I would change
The parts of me that I don't know
City to city
Continents and languages
One  woman alone
I promise you nothing

P.s. you can have my bones
I am thunder hear me roar;

paramour of Wotan

now the mountains rumble

when I anger and make war.

Beware the lair, my hair is fire

and I scorch from far.

I hurt your lies

and burn your truth.

I race the wind.

I always win.

Do not mock ...they’ll

find your body

on the rocks…

torn and ******  

black holes for eyes

bore out with nails.

You never saw

the truth so what!

You dispise

the one who tried to

show the way.

Go to hell !Oh boorish ****...

I’m here to stay…Vaincre Le ****

is surely meant for me...

just set me  free…If you should say,

Oh poisson,she smells... it would be fitting

for Wotan’s *****…

You  are a real piece of work!
I am still angry!
Semerian Perez  Aug 2012
Memories
Semerian Perez Aug 2012
I seem to think
Of you alot lately
This time
I want to break down
Cry
Scream
But mostly die

People tell me that you
Dont care about me
But I feel they are wrong
Others dispise you
For what you stand for
They do not see
What I see
Or know
What I know.

You have the heart
Of a fighter
Strength
That comes from within
Will power of titanium
Spoken harsh words
When necessary.

And yet thats only brushing
The surface
People have chipped away
At you with
Words
Actions
All of which I am guilty of
I am sorry for hurting you

I know it was from a lie
And I was wrong.
But did I lie
When I said
I love you?
No I dont think
I did

Truth is I still
Love you
And so
I hold onto
These precious
Memories
In the hope
That there is a chance
Before darkness consumes
My heart
And death takes my soul
From my body

All I have left
Are Memories
Eva Aug 2011
i love the smell of breath smoldered in alcohol, its sweet and warming, it makes sense until morning like most midnight performing involving you does, i love the way that words taste when their hot and misplaced coming from a mouth laced with hasty lies and replaced theighs, tonight you grab mine and I disguise my surprise, touching you back with dispise, you kiss me like youve done a thousand times, and i know you're not wanting any reply or goodbye, not tonight when you push and i gasp, things happening so fast that you might think youve been unsurpassed but my respect for you comes in dead last. "We have a weird relationship," but really you're giving me permission to ignore the suspicion that gathers when you lay me down for submission, your disposition is hungry and mad, fast and glad, things that don't make sense to a young lad like chad. maybe you know there will be pain in this lame game you play, everything to gain but nothing to maintain, you got it all worked out,  dont restrain, pay attention to the inhumane way he chooses to entertain his left brain, his **** busts a nut and a vein, sputtering to a stop like its gotta a sprain, but really its just a ******* puppy wishing it was a great dane.
Peyton Walker  May 2014
Listen
Peyton Walker May 2014
Every fibre in my body aches for you. 
My eyes for just a glimpse of your strong frame. 
My lips for your lips.
My hands to feel the steady beat of your heart. 
My ears for the familiar sound of your voice. 
Every skin cell pulls away from its attachment just to be closer to you. 
I envy your sweaters, they absorb your scent as you wear them. 
I dispise each blink for taking my gaze away from you for only a second. 
My voice yearns to speak your name and most of all my ears wait patiently to hear your words, if it's "I love you" or "I want my hands around your neck", I am listening.
Vladimir s Krebs Nov 2015
i feel like every breath i take when i am angry fill with smoke that takes my soul away.
every mistake i have made brings me and you closer. i want answer's that will tell me the truth.  why do i have a demonic life with smoke that fills my lungs! how angry do you have to make me till i lose control and go on a rampage. how long before i can get my own soul back.i am a demonic being that will take a life and rote it to death. i stand alone with anger that spits all your ******* lies out. im going to lose control and show this world what life with out a soul will be like when all you breath smoke in your lungs that destroy you life roting your mind away wiht only

ANGER
HATRED
DISPISE

smoke filling my lungs with only anger and *******.
i dont stand along with the crowd i stand alone away from societys ***** triks.

my demonic life has nothing but darkness that writes my life storie of what its like to be in hell.



smoke fills my lungs cause thats whats going to happen when you trade your soul for what ever greed needs

so trace my foot steps ill dissapear like the sun dose every day.

smoke fills my lungs cause i'm just a broken soul that has no where to go exept rain hell onto those whoe made my life misrable enstead
like is so pissy with every one so sufficating when yo have to work on a project for school
DAVID Aug 2016
silence the everlasting
fire, and the thirst of
your skin,  well satisfed.


never doubtfull,  your eyes
shine of placer, desire, and
complete satisfaction.

humdty in my pelvis, the
silky and sour shine, in the
lap of this gratefull  and loved
lion.

and for a minute,
just in that moment, im
complete, serene, loved, wanted,
a full beast, serened and thankfull

the sorrow, the pain, and fouling acts,
and the brutal theft, are just bumps,
overcomed, erased with the humidity
of your ***.

doubtfull is the one, that  
has not loved, her lie is a heavy
cross, dark, fatal, deadly, her soul
will never love beneath the divine
phalus.

in return, your eyes, truth,
love and venture, loving an
impossible, but loving even so,
stertores of your  loved and
kissed ******.

penetrated, softly and ferouciously,
are the echo of the fire, crashing the
sea, making life, steam, watering the
earth, generating the trofhic cicle,
of life, fire and water, steam of life,
passion between two beasts,
beautiful and loved.

your honney and your
desire, WILD, intense,
evergreene,  are vitals,
for a beast of montecristo,

that just drags, harm and pain,
of betrayal, every cut, every  scratch,
every stabing, made of me, the strong man
that y am.

unbreakcable, and living, loving impossibles
destroying the lies, ending the weakness
of  layars, full of hate,  and envy,
for losing  that, holding our
lives.

after that, and for their weakness
montecristo is the winner, a beast
with a heart, learning to love, the possible
and the impossible, to dissapear in the other,
rapped in her ligth, and her beauty,


the evil and weak of the mondego girls,
only speed up, their catastrophy,
y stand alone before their mistakes, and their
lies and anathems, turn against them,
truth clean the waters, and the fire make the
steam, that generates life, makng a full cicle.

so, threw desire, and mutual passion,
impossible happens, in the name of life,
and love, the desire quimera, could never erase
the time we touch, dispise the difference
full and wild.

generating steam, making life,
roaring, *******, groaning, and
in my mind and in yours, the same
desire, the overwelming truth, our truth,
and the incompresible lie, vain, the
echoes of the false, and ther infectious lies,
corrupting wath was always life.

the false notion of love, and their
acomplisses, with her conning, and the
not aceptacion, vain or insane,
dark, crazy and
incomplte.
this one's for the ladies. is not the engine is the choices, just that and aceptation , ] all mi love for the ones with aceptation and a clean heart.[
A rat catcher she would be
she smelt rodents from miles away
a female counterpart
with a body made of canvas
painting you on her mind

She will catch you and eat you
tear your limbs to bits
kitties claws are full of venom
all for the taste of you
she is the rat catcher

Her black fur and amber eyes
all rodents she does dispise
her **** does sting with rats blood
she is one hell of a killer
my sweet rat catcher

By Christos Andreas Kourtis aka NeonSolaris
Krystina Durfee Nov 2011
Dear Far Away Love,
There you go again.
Walking by me without even a glance.
I notice that you don't have any interest.
But I still admire you from a far.
I won't dare approach you.
For fear of rejection.
I've been waiting on you to notice me.
Time after time, I stare at your face as you pass me.
You walk with such a specific flow of movements.
Your smile brightens the room.
Your eyes are the perfect shade.
You seem to like the way she walks, talks, exists.
You pay her more attention then you should.
She will break you.
I fear there's nothing I can say.
For the sake of starting another quarrel.
Oh, how I hate the way you look at her.
She has a beautiful name, as I am nameless to you.
We've been around each other before, without you thinking of her.
Only of me and what you needed.
I was your everything... until she took your from me.
That is what I dispise about her.
The point of view that you used on me.
You spoke sweet nothings to me.
I took them to heart... foolish girl I was.
For now, I feel this way for another.
Now, this one is perfect for me.
Everytime I see him, he looks back.
He pays no attention to the other women.
I'm the only one in his sights.
The only one who will stick by me.
Forever.
You're lost something.
Something you should od held onto.
For this one... I am perfectly imperfect.
I deserve him.
I love him.. he loves me.
We are meant to be.
Sorry for your loss.
But you'll regret losing me.
I promise.
Love,
Nameless.
DAVID  Oct 2015
looking
DAVID Oct 2015
i watch obsenity,
lascivious acts,
looking for normality,

the spoted back, the traps
are everiwhere, and
*** is inspiring, i aspire to
normality, an afective life

healing mi heart, and accept
the *******, of relations, and feel
normal, all live'd theyr lives,
mine was stolen, for some creep old *******,
just the need, of feeling normal, accept the pain

as a normal man, or trie to feel as one,
is the gold of watching *** on the phone net,
the search of normality, despice the eyes y adore
and the highnes of loving someone, up there,

and every once a year or so, there is this look
in front of me, loving me in secret, understanding,
silent and sweet, all the rest if stupidity, and wounds
of a child arrased for the creeps, and their need of posses
someone, they don't understand, or love, is just obsession.

even so, the spots in my back, are clean,
my sanity too, so sometimes watching ****,
is just looking for normality, and wash away the pain,
of carry the creep in my ears. still inside my ears,
talking to me, and never letting go.

as whympy woman, or a souless creep,
but never get to me, **** in the window,
remainds me, how creepy and stupid they are.

and me, i m feeling more normal every day,
my heart is operative, and ready to live, dispise
the creep. i am a free man, alive and clean,
my soul is good, my heart is pumping, and i am,
very normal and *****, indeed.

— The End —