Behold this refined reflection
Of chaos I've collected
Over a million-odd moons

Reload this fog and smear
Squeaky streaks in glass where
Fingertips became brushes

mirror mirror on the wall
make my lips fuller
cheeks hollow
nose small
and eyes long
for nothing
may distort me now

i can't spell love out
its letters flap a whirlwind
meanings flush up and down my chest
yet never sideways
i can scribe it, dream it
spill it on the pavement
curse it, shout it
even vow it
which i am doing now
but mercy knows,
i can't spell love out
it'd take all the concrete
this side of the coastline
to put my foot down
and kick chaos into an elixir
but you poured everything
watched a heart turn to stone
cold
cracked it, chipped it
etched our name in it
then crushed it
i couldn't cast that sort of spell to save us
to turn us into something that
loves
cement images
with our handprints in them

of course you can stay here
where safety is synonymous with wasting
where you can water your paper whites
funnel your life into words
dust your suitcase
brush your hair
and rename the stars
from your kitchen window
       
but when you remember
when that passion hits you
like a boomerang
and beckons you
like a baby brother, or big sister
like guiding lights
and abandoned pups
all the same
don't let anything
a hitched breath nor a fitful heart
still your stampede to the door

for in that fleeting moment
time will catch and crash behind you
urging you onward
lending a splithair head-start
in a fresh lap
of your leap for life

so bolt into the world
and don't check the mirror
on your way out
don't leave a note
those who love you
will jump for joy knowing
you couldn't break from dancing
as you fled

don't let your eyes tell you if it's raining
but don't let your feet stop you if they do
don't keep track of whys and nots
don't keep a greenhouse of regrets
and dear, sweet dreamer
don't you dare come back

i love the way
his hair holds snowflakes
like grains of the cold moon
and how when he breathes
he blows coal dust to gold
stirs some life back in these bones
of mine
then sets my heart aglow
as an echo to his
shine

i'm tired of the terror
midnight wreaks

sheets can stay on the carpet
stickers can outlive me
on the ceiling
and the clock can tick and chime and
i will watch it crawl
once again
when i'm done
clamping my eyes shut

'cause something's wrong when
cause of death reads:
"ran out of breath
chasing her dreams"

so wake me up
don't wait for
dawn to break us
take me out of
this bedroom
it's a tomb, it's a tomb
and i can't breathe

sheets can stay in the ground
stars can outlive me
on the fan blades
and the clock can tick and chime and
wind me up and
wring me out to die
but not this time

'cause i'm not done
clawing my eyes out

so wake me up