I
I feel a darkness in me
that is not worthy of love
and is not capable anyways.
It is selfish and will hurt you.
But there is a bright light as well
and it has also caused you pain.
For the noble light removes me
out of belief it will stop you from hurting.
And when I want to love you
I know that I must not.
It is an inner turmoil that has accomplished nothing.
Your pain and confusion was meant to be spared.
I am a curse.
You have felt pain whether my intentions were pure or not.

II
A piece of my heart flew away
everytime I dissappointed myself.
A piece of my heart melted
everytime someone I trusted walked away.
A piece of my heart passed away
with each loved one lost.
Pieces of my heart have been broken
by the careless hands of others.
I feared there was nothing left
but in unknown, brief moments
I feel a slight spark in my chest
And I am reminded that there is still one person who can make me feel like there is no darkness in the world.

III
I think
I love you.
It seems clearer now
for some reason.
But this abrupt
clarity
is exactly what keeps me from knowing...
Why now?
Why did it take so long?
Just when my frustrations had peaked,
I found your name within my heart again.

IV
How I do love thee
I love thee with what heart I possess
but I'm afraid not much lies within this chest
And I fear you an injustice
If only part of a heart you request
Then I offer it as my best
For I do not know the tests
I may face in this life
nor the next.
If we should be but friends
I would embrace you as my best
for you have given me memories
that will forever be cherished
One day at a time it will show
One day we will know
But with you i'd rather grow
Than to have lost it and be unsure.

Made with Love

Broken and left,
but left by force
And now it's murky,
I can't see the course.

With you, without you,
You think you know better
But my feelings are contained,
in an unwritten letter.

The communication age,
is too much for me to bear
There's nothing I can do,
Without a reminder of you there.

In one way, in all ways,
in any way you can
You're sorry, you love me,
I'm ruining our plan.

I'm trying to keep sane,
Trying to just stay alright
But I feel like I'll surrender,
to the weakest of your fights.

I'm supposed to just go back to you,
Cause you've got "so much left to give,"
"You can't just move on,
and forget the life we planned to live."

I haven't forgotten
You've just turned it rotten

I keep trying to run,
but there is nowhere to hide
from all of my problems
that I keep inside.
Honestly, I think
we're all just waiting to die.
We try to seize the moment,
but then its "good bye",
and forced to face reality,
you see an ugly side.
There is no one that knows me,
that can say I hadn't tried;
everyone's watched me grow,
and seen me as I died.
There's still nothing I want to say
after all the tears I've cried,
my words received no water
and to the world they simply dried.
With no direction,
I only stumble with no guide,
a wimpering soul,
just trying to get by.
My mind my biggest bully,
a truth I should confide...
as it rips on me each day,
I wish to run and hide.
I can't stand to seize the moment;
I must go out with the tide
even though I ran away
they can't say I hadn't tried.

If I was brave
I would take your offer and runaway.
I’d burn every bridge
And watch smoke choke the sky.
Because this bleeding heart can’t survive anymore.
Not with all these lies.