where do I go from here
alone, afraid
craving your arms and not knowing why
is this feeling as real as
the sun so bright?
or is it just snow melting on my flustered cheeks
its substance dripping off skin like
the way your eyes waver from mine
but I cannot catch it on my bare palms
because while this loneliness swallows me whole
being a part of something more  
would leave me just as ruined

this love holds a knife against my throat
and cuts ribbons into my skin
with every lingering thought of you
is my love a sin?
is my sole purpose just another flaw of my being?
crimson blood upon white walls spell it out
not in my native language, of course
I guess my heart will never know
if I was just meant to be ****** in the hands of this curse

ultimately,
we would be tragic
but I cannot keep my thoughts off this temptation
even though I don’t know if this is what I want
and you could easily crush me
between your fingers
because I am as small as
a spider wafting along the breeze on a thin strand
of who knows what
practically nothing
that’s what I am
that’s what we are