You left me alone in the middle of hell
I am leaving me too
TTYFL!

I am not doing this again tonight
Fighting all of this inside of me.
I cannot...I am way too tired to do it anymore.
Bury me with my blanket...you can keep the rest!
Let's face it...there may be a 'minute' or feeling pain-free.  
But honestly, isn't this terminal?  
I am too tired to do it anymore.  
Not tonight.  


I am NitaAnn:
Someone to ****
Someone to make you laugh
Someone to hit
Someone to make you smile
Someone to abuse
Someone to be here for you
Someone to clean up your mess
Someone to forget about
Until I am gone...

Do not worry - I will not 'bother' you with my pain.  
I will 'deal with it' after all are in bed...I will NOT reach out.
No one cares anyway - just smile and walk away.
Go ahead and abuse me - I deserve it and I will not be here anyway.
It isn't me.  
There is no "me"
I am not real - I am an empty shell
You will never see me cry!
You will NEVER see my pain!
I am broken but you will never know.

In the face of 'expected abandonment or *******'
you know what you have to do, NitaAnn.  
Yes, I have always known.

Smile pretty for everyone, NitaAnns.
Smile and walk away....