there was surgical steel in my lungs
the day you told me how you felt how you really felt
and when i took a breath
it was hollow and swollen and metallic so
i thought i'd bitten my tongue too hard
when i kept my words behind my closed lips
i didn't understand what you were saying not really
but your eyes looked cold
like you'd been living in a freezer
your whole life and as your mouth moved your eyes bored into the wall behind me
i knew there was a hole there made by your icy stare and i felt another cutting into my own skin
as the cigarette smoke curled around you
i thought you'd never looked more beautiful
at the same moment i realized
you'd never been so
ugly
let's just be friends bears the weight of
so many unspoken feelings like
i still love my exgirlfriend and
you were just a warm body and
i've forgotten how to feel anything for anyone anymore and
it scares me
maybe i thought that last one
you were precision and tact
in its purest form
a single element designed to break my heart
and i think you knew
so when i asked you for a cigarette to melt the
steel in my lungs and justletmebreathegoddamnit
your retreating footsteps told me all i ever needed
to hear
and my sobs were hollow and swollen and metallic
like the blood pooling in my mouth from my
bitten-off tongue