Eight years of commitment
to file away-
I’ve never been good
at finishing tasks;
I fiddle my thumbs when asked,
dramatizing a victimized perception
to anyone who will listen
as if they aren’t suffering
in the dirt,
as if I'm special
when no one is special
because we are all perfection
reflected on earth

As a perfected being
it is my responsibility
to let you go,
to lay down the second arrow
and redirect this energy
into a meditative state,
yet my finger slips
on the bowstring
and the cushion stays fluffed:

Instantly my psyche
self-deprecates
and turbulent sensations erupt,
over time
and how it was spent
leading up to this exact moment
but all that arises is loneliness,
allowing the arrow
to fall into my chest

Telling myself over and over,
"alone doesn't have to mean lonely,
just move forward"
until the double edged sword
cuts this perceived loss
out of my gut
and humility bleeds through
as a reminder
that we only part to meet again,
whether in this life
or a different one

A highlight of consequence
for believing in
everlasting phenomenon
and to show value in
unlearning resistance
to the push and pull
of ocean and moon
because acceptance
heals all pain,
but to cling only strikes odds
with gravity,
forcing the second arrow loose