I can't believe that you have gone.

This isn't real, it’s a ruse, it's a trick,  
your absence lingers like dawn's mist,  
but with the sunrise it will surely lift.
My phone will ring, the door is unlocked,  
and I’ll keep your dinner warm
as I wait for you to come home.

Why the hell did you have to die?!  
My fists press hard against the wall,  
and I clench my teeth until my jaw hurts,
as tears roll down cheeks flushed with anger.
I curse God, time, space, fate,  
and everything that took you away.

I was never much of a haggler,
but, I’ll trade all of my tomorrows for yesterday,
and I’ll find a way to save you
and cherish every moment with you.
Please, rewind the clock, I pray;
Even if it is just for one more day.

Gloominess penetrates my worn-out bones,
as lead weights burden my heavy steps.  
My breath feels too heavy to carry,  
and these memories are too painful to hold.
I sink, I drown, I gasp for air,
and I fade into the depths of despair.

But, after a while, life is not so hard,
I watch the sunrise, as a new dawn begins,  
and your memory no longer hurts to recall,
instead, it warms my heart like a gentle hug.  
I smile because you lived and you were loved;
And somehow, I can accept that this is
more than enough.

Please, now go and rest in peace.

©️Lizzie Bevis