I text her, “I Love You, Missy. Do you love me too?” She replies, “In a particular language, I want you dead is coded as wv bl dy rr My love is eternal is coded as vg rh ol nb You are very sweet is coded as hd ev zi bl And I hate you stupid is coded as hg bl sy rr” She pauses, as if for an eternity, before continuing, “In that language, my answer is, ‘gl bl ol rr’ You decode it, lover boy.”