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Josie Stewart
Poems
Sep 2021
Why I stopped calling
I'm not your prodigal son;
I'm your abandoned daughter.
Don't wait around for me to return.
I won't.
I gave and gave because I was a child
Hoping for love I received conditionally.
When I stopped giving, you left.
That says more about you than me.
You worship a God in your image.
One who asks for all.
You say he loves unconditionally,
But that's what you said about you.
You worship an abuser,
And in his name you abuse.
You pray for repentance
But are unwilling to change yourself.
I know you miss me.
You want me back so I can give,
And a part of you really does care.
Your actions matter more.
You could love me again
If you wanted.
I haven't hidden myself from you.
I'm still here.
You can't expect me to come
Crawling back to you.
The fattened calf you'd offer only
If I approached on your terms.
That's not the forgiving father.
That's a parent still grasping
For control of their child.
I don't need your food.
If you wanted to learn,
Maybe even consider
You could be wrong,
I might call you again.
You won't even use my name.
Like the neighbors of your savior,
You say, isn't this our son?
I'm unwelcome in your home.
So I've finally done it.
I did what I knew I had to.
I shook the dust from my sandals,
And I left.
#parents
#abandonment
#selfcare
#trauma
#home
#pain
Written by
Josie Stewart
34/Trans Female/USA
(34/Trans Female/USA)
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