I speak about my trauma often
not out of a want to be pitied
or attention. (Everything inside of me wishes
to be invisible.)

But,
I speak about my trauma because,
like a white water river–
my thoughts, feelings, and memories
come flashing down,
and I am engulfed
in flames.

My pen grounds me.
It is the only way for me to see
I am burning.

I wish to longer speak about it, too.
I wish to be “normal”.
I wish to just “get over it”, (like I am expected).

But my body
will not let me forget,
even if I wish
to forgive.