I stand alone with my shadow, Developing larger on the floor. Voices are heightened in these loosened hours, I can feel my failures outside my door. For is it fair to live in fear, Consistently dreading numbed durations? I still sense the pain of things that won't adhere, And uneasy twinges of deserted sensations. My apathy is back and it has worsened, My eyes have widened because I know what comes next. The flood of my trauma ends lack of emotion, drowning me, sending me straight to my death-
I have felt apathy my whole life
I feel so much I push it out of my head so I don't die. I feel too much and itsit's horrible. I feel numbed most days now to try and deal with it