I am oh so anxious
I am so scared that I'm just seeing what I want to see,
and that you're playing with me
in the same ways you like to play with all those other girls.

I am stuck between
facts and feelings,
head versus heart.

Last night you told me the ways you like to hurt people,
just to see them cry
and even you could not deny that I was one of those people at some point.

How stupid would I be to try to love you again,
like I used to?
It's funny how I get my hopes up
again and again,
praying that you're not the person that I know you actually are.

When will I learn?

Will I ever learn?

I am told that I am a romantic,
bordering on fully delusional.
I look for love in the same places I've lost it,
look for my scars to heal in the arms of the one
who caused the cuts to begin with.