Love Huh,
How do one get over this trick?
That has deluded me for ages
The meaning I misinterpreted for decades
Lies……… All lies!!
Scammed of my innocence
And didn’t even realize,
Broken, pitiful, self-depreciating
Still, I cared less
Longed for that affection I knew I would never get
You’re clingy, I was told
Like a fiend
I craved, hungered
Worse from addiction
Truly, I was blind
From the signs that carelessly lingered
From the sovereignty I lived with for years
Oh
'Empty smiles'
I could wear them so well
Hoping it gets better, it never did
One language
''Hurt''
More Hurt,
It really did hurt I swear
The Tears, PAIN
Memories,
They just keep coming
Blackmailed my emotions
Tormented my conscience.
The blankness, abandonment, Stillness
Blossoming pain with every beat
I lost my self
I lost me,
But held on hoping for more
No!
Begging for more
A tiny bit…… yea
Praying it gets better
Then
I fell hard in cupid
An abuser I choose
It’s all a secret, such a fool
No one would ever know.
Dire for help but would not accept any,
I need time I say, for what exactly?
Love is blind I guess,
It will turn out well I hoped
It’s all good
Through it all I got a gift
The best of its kind
In the 'New' I find solace,
Experience laughter, peace
Though the word 'love' still eludes me,
Still I stand holding on,
Expecting a contrary force
To whisper in my ears as I behold it
"It's no trick, it’s no lie, it's no mirage, and it's right here...
Looking straight into my eyes"
Finally, I overcame
Wait! did I?