do you know how it feels, to look into your mother’s eyes and see them weeping, and to know that you are the reason behind her misery? when she looks at you without the tears, but you can still see their shadows imprinted upon her cheeks? her eyes puffed like pillows, though she cannot get rest? to lay in bed at midnight and hear her quietly sobbing to herself through the ****** thin walls that seem to echo louder and louder the more she suppresses the sound? do you know how it feels to watch your mother helplessly watch you die? to see the pain through her glass-fragile eyes?
because i do.
a poem written about the misery that i would see my mother go through as a result of my eating disorder - though she couldn't help me, all she could do was watch from afar because i wouldn't let her closer.