I want the be soft edges melted down from the broken mirrors of my hallowed halls
I want to be whisper touches and gentle words
I want my smile to be bright,
never faltering,
and always knowing
When the world is loud and the wind is howling out of control I want to be the quiet
I don't want to fill the space with what I want you to see but with what I am

But what I am is sharp teeth and prickly points with an ooey gooey center
Words leave me feeling frozen when they slice through my warmest sweaters
My knees click and clank together, faltering through every step like my legs are stone and the street, molasses
I am Christmas songs in June staring you in the eye, begging you to tell me it's too early
I poke at my own bruises and have the audacity to condemn you for reaching out with spindly fingers to poke them too

I am also spiced gingerbread and hugs with too short of arms that seem to be able to hold you tight as if they're miles long
I am built from fire, one shot of me will leave your ears burning
My icicle veins have long since thawed leaving puddles deep enough for us to grab hands and jump into together
Butterfly kisses and cornflake potatoes shaped this body standing before you
My cells are made of crystals of sugar and tiny fireflies
And my heart reaches towards the souls floating around me

I am the good and the bad
I am leftover ashes from fallen homes
The longingness of nostalgia and the need for new adventure
I cry for the weeds that are cut down along the road while my own hands are painted with the dirt that pulled out my own

I am contradiction and balance
I am a desire to be.